Product Description
Having a child is a cherished dream for most of us. But what happens when nothing happens--or a pregnancy ends in tragedy? Authors John and Sylvia Van Regenmorter share their own experience in When the Cradle Is Empty: Answering Tough Questions about Infertility. With wisdom, compassion, and sound biblical advice, this comprehensive guide helps couples explore their options, get the medical help they need, deal with pressures from family and friends, and protect their marriage. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (9)

If you buy it, but it used.
I don't usually write reviews, but I'm going to for this book because I feel like I completely wasted my money.
I think if you're at the point where you're buying books to read about your infertility, you're well paste learning about what's in this book. Everything in the book I was already aware of. I skipped over most of it because I thought it was a waste of my time reading it. There were a few pages that had info that gave me encouragement, but not enough to buy. The people who wrote this book have been a great asset to the infertility community, I just don't think the book is worth reading.
Buy Hannah's Hope. It was much better. But if you buy Hannah's hope, don't buy this book because the two books have repetitive info.

Not Enough Meat
I was really looking forward to reading this book by Focus on the Family and was rather disappointed with the simplicity of it.There really wasn't much meat to the book and I would recommend purchasing it used.

I agree with some points....
I was expecting a little more from the book than what was offered.I felt as if I were being told how to feel rather than being comforted with words.Perhaps I mustn't be so senstive.Infertility is not an easy subjet to discuss and hurt feelings are bound to arise.I didn't seek medical help until my husband and I tried for three years.According to this book, that's a huge no-no and I was almost frightened that there might be absolutely no hope since we delayed our trip to the doctor.
Try to keep an open mind when reading this book.

Wonderful And Comforting
We received this book as a gift while dealing with our long infertility journey. It was such a blessing to have the compassion and reassurance this book provided during a time of our lives that was so hard and lonely (lonely because unless you have gone through it, you can't really understand it). After God blessed us with a child I passed this book on to another friend who was dealing with infertility as well. She was so pleased and relieved to get this book once she opened the pages and began to also receive it's reassurance and support.

Useful Christian resource for infertility
I was so pleased to finally be able to read this book.It was great to hear about infertility from both the husband's and wife's points of view.I felt like my struggles with infertility were validated and discovered that there are others feeling the same things as I do.This book does take a Christian perspective to infertility, which I appreciated.While the authors do give some perspective on assisted reproductive technologies, I would also recommend speaking with your pastor or spiritual advisor to find out what your church group thinks, as I have discovered it varies some between denominations.I appreciated all the great web links and other resources the authors outlined in the book as well.A read well worth it. ... Read more

Product Description
In "Love and Infertility", Kristen Magnacca offers herfirsthand experience of infertility--the heartbreak, depression andmiscommunication--and how she and her husband, Mark finally devisedthe much needed life-saving strategy that led them to achievingpregnancy. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (5)

A buffet of ideas for coping and communicating
The book has a "buffet" of ideas of techinques for dealing with the stresses of infertility.Ideas include practical communication starters, and thought-provoking ways of looking at your partner's and your own needs and communication styles.Some ideas I left on the buffet table.With some others, I piled my plate high!

Useful for anyone who is just starting out or well along the infertility treatment path, and is finding it stressful (and you'd be hard pressed not to).

A GREAT BOOK!!!
This book is a must read, she talks about struggles couples face when going throw infertility and ways to gain control back, This book makes you feel like your not alone, other couples face the same obstacles as you do!

She lets you into her home and heart by sharing stories of herinfertility experience and what steps her and her husband took to solve their own problems. I felt like she was speaking to me through her book like a friend. she's honest, down to earth, funny, practical and educated. She has wonderful tips and techniques that are very helpful in dealing with you husband your family and your life. It gave me a new prepective and new hope, I would reccommend this book to everyone.

Helpful Read!
Thanks to Love and Infertility I'm back in control of my emotions and communicating better with my husband! We now have our own elevator speech and I'm much more comfortable in social situations. We're also using the gratitude list to combat our negative feelings of being childless.I recommend this book to anyone battling infertility!

Read it!
Kristen is both funny and wise. She's been there, both professionally and personally, and she's learned from it. Through anectodes and practical tips, she shares her victories and lets us, too, learn from her failures. Her book is an honest, practical and easy to read compilation of very personal anecdotes and well-researched strategies for finding balance during a very trying time. Read it-- you'll be glad she is holding your hand on the rocky journey to parenthood!

A Stress Reliever!
Love and Infertility was such a stress relief for me. The book offered a wide variety of tips on how to communicate better with your partner to creating a fertility game plan to making a goals list. The book is an easy read and is also good for couples that are looking to seek balance in their lives. I'm thankful for this new perspective on infertility and will recommend it to all my friends!

... Read more

Product Description

Insight and frank, friendly advice on overcoming infertility -- from two women who have lived through it all.

Customer Reviews (71)

Insulting and judgemental
If you have been struggling to conceive, skip this book. From the title and reviews of this book, I expected a funny, honest view of the trials and tribulations of infertility, but instead found that these authors were more interested in judging their friends' life choices, as well as berating themselves and other women who delayed having a family, than they were in providing helpful information with a humorous twist. There's none of that. Instead, prepare to feel worse about your infertility. While it's true that a woman's fertility diminishes after age 35, the last thing that those struggling with infertility need is another reason to blame themselves. This book was insulting and depressing. If I wasn't already ok with my own situation, I think this book could have really pushed me over the edge. I hope I can spare someone else the mistake of reading it.

Good information...for the wrong audience
I picked up this book after TTC my third child. I had gone through infertility treatments to conceive my first two and after I suffered a miscarriage and a late term loss, I needed some encourgement. I didn't find encouragement with this book--in fact, it nearly made me throw in the towel and not start my fertility injections. I was 36, there were whole chapters on why I shouldn't be having a baby this late and how many things were stacked against me. In addition, the author's description of fertility inejctions thoroughly freaked me out (they turned out to be not nearly as bad as the author described, although perhaps that's due to the new technologies available now). I found the information on NOT waiting to have a child because of lifestyle and convenience to be good. The authors and I both share the same attitude on 43 year old Hollywood actresses saying, "Sure I want biological kids someday." (Uh...better get on that. That ship has likely sailed), but this information is being read by infertile women, not by 25 year olds in their prime partying years, you know? Women dealing with infertility don't need to be told that they waited too long to have a baby over and over and over and over. Some of us actually wanted to wait for a GOOD father for our kids and not to just procreate with the various potheads and dead beats we may have dated over the years. Some of the good guys we dated didn't turn out to be marriage material either. Sometimes you can't control this. Many of my friends jumped into marriage in their early 20s and nearly all of them are divorced, and on husband number two, and dealing with the fallout of the divorce, child custody battles, late child support, etc. A few are facing fertility problems because they want to give their new husband a child. I find the warning of "Better find a husband before it's too late" a little alarming. It's o.k. to be choosy and hold out for awhile.

I also found some inaccuracies in the information (women with a tilted uterus will have fertility issues, for instance. This is possible, but not definite, and most doctors will say it shouldn't impede conception. I've conceived naturally twice with my titled uterus, as has my mother and many friends).

While infertility can be expensive, if you are lucky enough to live in a state with mandated coverage, it needn't be the scary financial disaster that the authors make it out to be. I understand that they're trying to "give it to us straight", but the whole process doesn't need to be hopeless and fraught with pain, expense and all around despair. Infertility sucks. No way about it. I was just hoping for a more balanced account of the process, I guess.

Great for newly found infertility
I can see how some who have journeyed the ups and downs of infertility would find this book somewhat "insulting." My personal experience is fairly new. At the time I purchased this book infertility was foreign to me. I thought you would just take one round of Clomid, and a stork would fall out of the sky. That's how it happened for everyone else I knew with infertility issues! Also, I am a newly married women, 22, and I have known do to my infrequent cycles, that infertility would be an issue for a while now. With that being said, this book helped me laugh and cry about the emotion I knew I would soon and am currently facing. It you are looking for an informative book with a lengthy back index, I could see how this book would not be for you. If you are looking for a "Hey I have been through this, and you can make it through it" book, this is it. It is honest, raw, and downright brutal at times. But all in all, I gave it a 5 out of 5, because it worked for ME.

Informative and helpful.
This book is a great read for someone just starting their infertility journey. It's very informative for both men and women, but since it was written by two women and from their perspective (mostly-there are parts written by their husbands), it will better suit women. It gives you a lot of information about different procedures, but also offers emotional consolation.

Good Intro Book When you are Freaking Out
I got this book immediately after a doctors appointment where I found out I had high FSH.In my case it is due to age and at that point I had no idea about the other problems that were going on with my body (and there were many).

There were two types of books on those shelves in the book store - sappy inspirational success stories ( which I didn't want to hear about) and detailed scientific books (which just confused me) and then there was this book.

A Few Good Eggs was a great way to slide gently into the infertility world.No, it doesn't cover all details of all procedures but in the early stages of disbelief I liked the wry, emotional support with a just a little nitty gritty detail - what to expect in terms of emotions, doctors, injections, husbands, friends.

On husbands, no they are not always willing and able to have lots of sex. That is a fallacy. But I emphasized with this little bit - husbands (if it's not male infertility) will "get over it" much, much quicker than you will.They care about you but many have very little interest in just what you are going through (throw your modesty out the window).They may listen to you but the don't want to talk about it and it was good to be prepared for that.Of course, this is not every husband out there but I suspect that it represents a lot of them.

For when you have more knowledge of your particular situation, get you details from books like: The Baby Solution, IVF (Dr Sher), and The Infertility Survival Handbook.

To that reviewer who said that she was happy and in her 30s and didn't appreciate being lectured at about her eggs. Well, hear this sweetie - no matter how healthy you are, no matter what you look like on the outside - the inside is on it's own timeclock and you have next to no control over it.I was you.

Time is not kind to the female reproductive system.Infections that you aren't even aware of block your tubes, fibroids affect many women after aged 30 which in turn can affect embryo implantation and your hormones begin to change.

There were some tones in this book that could be a little off putting but ignore those, enjoy the humor and take control of your infertility. ... Read more

Product Description

Product Description
An internationally known nutritional expert has found that couples can maximize their chances of getting pregnant by making changes in diet and lifestyle. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (1)

ALL the things you can do to boost your odds.
My husband and I are just beginning to explore the reasons we're having trouble conceiving, and before going to our doctors, I wanted to make sure that we were giving ourselves the best possible odds.This book is great at summarizing the many things affecting fertility that are in our control right now, and since reading this book, we've changed our diet, started taking supplements and herbs, and begun acupuncture.But the book also covers traditional medical treatments; it just doesn't assume that they're a first step.The book is pretty short, which is good, but I would have liked more detail about particular herbs.Also, it's written with British terms, which is only a problem if you don't know that linseed oil and flax seed oil are the same thing (I spent a lot of time looking for "linseed oil," which is the British name).There are also some suggestions that we're not up to ("don't store food in plastic"; "eat only organic food"), but that's our fault, not the book's.

I highly recommend it! ... Read more

Product Description
Providing a clear understanding of infertility, this practical resource analyzes and describes the diagnoses and treatment of infertility - both male and female - with Chinese medicine. It includes Western medical information with explanations of physiology, reproductive biology, and modern infertility treatments to expand the understanding of patient options. Content discusses all aspects of achieving a successful pregnancy, including pre-conception care, conception, pregnancy and miscarriage, and modern medical treatments. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (6)

Treatment of Infertility with Chinese Medicine
Simply this book is clear, concise and packed with in-depth knowledge of treating infertility with Chinese Medicine.It is an invaluable resource for my practice.

Great Service
Great service, speedy delivery, book condition as described. Will do business with this company again.

Great Professional Reference
For anyone looking to treat infertility disorders, I would highly recommend this book. The quality and sheer volume of information presented is quite impressive, and the same goes for her seminars. I would not suggest this book for anyone other than a TCM practitioner, as it is a professional text. The content is both highly specialized and should not be used by those without extensive training; besides, there are plenty of other introductory books that will give patients a more comprehensive view of TCM theory in an easily digestible format.

That said, this book is one of my favorites in the subject, and fully worth several times the purchase price!

Treatment of Infertility with Chinese Medicine
A valuable,modern and important resource for any practitioner wishing to work in or specialize in the field of infertility.Her analytical and poetic mind combined with the potency of Chinese medicine make this inspirational reading.Its a must have I cannot recommend highly enough.

Pretty Amazing
This book is the A++++ must have for treating fertility disorders with chinese medicine. Jane Lyttleton does an EXCELLENT job of combining western knowledge and treatments with traditional chinese medicine. She is extremely thorough and detailed in all pathologies and treatments. AMAZING! ... Read more

Product Description
Around three quarters of people who turn to adoption do so because of infertility and those working in this field need information, guidance and support to assist them in the process of adoption to support the adopters and to deal with any issues that may result from infertility. "Adopting after Infertility" is an accessible and informative interdisciplinary book that addresses the issues that professionals working with adopters and the adopters themselves face when going through the adoption process and the impact of infertility on their experiences. The book includes chapters on the effects of infertility, why people may choose adoption and the assessment and preparation process. It also covers what an Adoption Panel needs to know about the prospective parents, the experiences of those coming to adoption from minority communities or when living with health conditions and post-adoption support needs. Personal accounts by people who have experienced adopting after infertility are included throughout the book. This book will be essential reading for professionals and academics from a range of disciplines including social work, psychology, health, mental health and counselling.It will also be invaluable to students studying for post-qualifying awards. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (8)

Recommends ADOPTION as a way to get pregnant.
I'm not joking.In her chapter on miscellaneous tips she comments that so many people seem to get pregnant after adopting that you should consider this route.For the record - and this stat is NOT mentioned in her book - 5% of couples who end treatment will end up conceiving on their own *regardless of whether they choose adoption or not.*

The rest of the stuff she mentions (herbs, vitamins, etc.) seemed like it was all gleaned from the internet and is presented without any detail.

Skip this book!

one is too many stars..
I rated this book with one star .
Too little medical and scientific info, stupid tips...,
as the size of the book shows; this lady has not much to say or much help to offer. There is much more to infertility than a few herbs and vitamins.
You get better books for just a few $'s more ( " the couple's guide to fertility" or " taking charge of your fertility" )
Don't bother with this !

Karen Bradstreet book review
Bradstreet's book has been a god send!after years of struggling with poor digestive health and recurrent miscarraiges and infertility i read her book and came upon candida as a possible problem.i am still not pregnant but treatment of the candida, which i did have, is going well and i hope to achieve a full term pregnancy sometime this year.THANK YOU KAREN

IT REALLY WORKS
Karen Bradstreet is fantastic and I only hope she reads the reviews posted on the Amazon.com website, so she will feel satisfied that her book is helping lots of people all over the world. I bought her book 'Overcoming Fertility Naturally' about 2 months ago, and within 30 days of my husband and I both trying her recomended combinations of vitimins and herbs religiously every day, I was pregnant. We had been trying to get pregnant for about 1 1/2 years. Now some of the skeptics out their may think it was coincidence, and perhaps it was, but I am positive Karen's book helped us along our way. For those of you who have had trouble conceiving, give this book a try as you have nothing to loose. Good luck. Thank you so much Karen Bradstreet.

Save your money
This book provided only generalizations without sufficient detail. There are plenty of great books out there on infertility. I suggest reading one of those. This book does not proide sufficient information on dosage orwhen to take herbs during your cycle. This could lead to some potentiallydamaging situations for some women. ... Read more

Product Description

Infertility and Patriarchy explores the lives of infertile women whose personal stories depict their daily struggles to resist disempowerment and stigmatization. Marcia C. Inhorn has produced a unique study of gender, politics, and family life in contemporary Egypt.

Product Description
Infertility Counseling: A Comprehensive Handbook for Clinicians, second edition, is a comprehensive, multidisciplinary textbook for all health professionals providing care for individuals facing reproductive health issues. It is the most thorough and extensive book currently available for clinicians in the field of infertility counseling, providing an exhaustive and comprehensive review of topics. It addresses both the medical and psychological aspects of infertility, reviewing assessment approaches, treatment strategies, medical counseling issues, third-party reproduction, alternative family building and post infertility counseling issues. Each chapter follows the same format: introduction, historical overview, literature review, theoretical framework, identification of clinical issues, suggestions for therapeutic interventions, and future implication. This edition also includes extensive appendixes of clinical tools useful to the clinician, including an Internet database of resources and an extensive glossary of terminology. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (1)

A "must have" textbook
Sharon Covington and Linda Hammer Burns have done an outstanding job on this second addition.I expected nothing but the best from these two strong leaders and educators in the field of infertility and reproduction.This is a "must have" for all clinicians to read and reference.It is well written, well organized and an easy to follow format.I especially appreciate the global perspective this book captures.It brings us new insights and developments in this fast growing complex field.Each distinguished contributing author approached his/her work with the most up-to-date literature, technology and infomation to help us stay abreast and within the forefront of our profession.Thank you for producing such a wonderful and valuable textbook. I have recommended this book to many colleagues and know you will too. ... Read more

Product Description

An estimated 10 percent of married couples worldwide are unable
to conceive or have experienced infertility at some point in
their lives. The stresses infertility places on a marriage are numerous.
But in A Spiritual Companion to Infertility, Julie Irwin Zimmerman
views the hardship of infertility not only as a physical condition but
as an opportunity for spiritual growth.

In language that is personable and frank, Zimmerman uses her own
experiences to help others understand the myriad challenges that arise
while struggling with infertility. This book explores issues such as:

Customer Reviews (3)

Unique Faith-Based Look at Infertility
This book is a refreshingly different look at the heartache of infertility.Unlike the many other books I've read on the subject, this book acknowledges how being unable to conceive a child affects every aspect of your life as well as those around you.The author not only gives a very candid account of how infertility challenges your faith in God, your marriage and your relationships, she also provides thoughtful scriptural references and spiritual insight to help you meet those challenges.I highly recommend this book as a unique resource for anyone struggling with infertility and for those who love them.

Woderful Resource
This book is a wonderful resource for those that are struggling with infertility as well as friends and family members of the couple.The author is very open about her own struggles within herself, marriage and faith during her quest for motherhood.The book gave a lot of insight on how infertility affects all areas of your life and can help those around the couple have empathy and compassion when discussing their decisions. I highly recommend this book to couples and their friends and families.

A Spiritual Companion to Infertility

Solid research combined with personal experience
Julie Irwin Zimmerman, a journalist and mother of two, has combined her professional expertise and her personal story to produce an excellent resource on infertility. The eleven chapters begin with scripture quotations and end with prayers and reflections. Along with solid research, Zimmerman shares her own experiences and emotions as she discusses the effects of infertility on relationships and religious beliefs.

The chapter on morality of treatment opens with questions that arise from ongoing discoveries that facilitate biological parenthood, then addresses the ethical, legal, and moral dilemmas our culture has faced since the birth of the first in-vitro baby in 1978. Zimmerman concentrates on the positions of Christian denominations on such issues as fertility medications (and selective abortion), artificial and in-vitro insemination, and surrogacy. In the end, Zimmerman advises couples to learn as much as possible about their faith's positions, then decide together on their values before beginning treatment. "To do any less is unfair to ourselves and any children we might create," she writes.

The prayer and reflection section contains a passage from Philippians asking for "knowledge and full insight to determine what is best." There is also a prayer for God's guidance by St. Teresa of Avila, and a prayer of trust by John Henry Newman. The original prayer, O Lord, Help Me Decide, thanks God for a wide range of technologies in our lives today and asks for help in deciding "what is of you and from you" and courage to follow God's guidance "especially when it is hard to do so."

The chapter on special situations looks at infertility and step-parenting, miscarriage and stillbirth, and secondary infertility (having one or more children but being unable to conceive another). The final three chapters deal with the decision to give up the quest for biological parenthood. Adoption and choosing to be "childfree" are explored.

Throughout the work Zimmerman tackles thorny questions like what to tell others and how to weather frustration, disappointment, and loss. Each chapter's prayers and reflections are rich resources. A list of print and web-based references rounds out the story.
... Read more

Customer Reviews (6)

ART is not evil
Ihave been dealing with infertility and pregnancy loss for more than five years now. I bought this book last year during my fourth year on my infertility journey.

While I appreciate the author's viewpoints in many instances - I think her opinions or even knowledge of Assisted Reproductive Technologies (ART), such as IVF is really narrow minded. Her tone is almost derisive.

There are MANY couples who finally achieved their dream of parenthood through IVF.

She mentions that one of the reasons she did not pursue IVF was because she was concerned about having too many frozen embryos.

One is lucky if one has ONE EMBRYO make it to freeze - let alone many. I have done 3 IVF cycles and out of 3 cycles - and more than 50 eggs - only TWO embryos have ever made it, to be frozen. Not only that, some women are lucky if they even get ANY eggs from an egg retrieval. There are many women like me on infertility support boards/groups everywhere - who have similar stories to tell. Like trying to conceive naturally, IVF and other forms of ART don't always work - so I feel that when they do it is because God has been working through the process to make it so.

Ms. Flowers also offers the couple who has struggled with infertility for a long time little hope beyond adoption.

Adoption is a beautiful option to family building. However, it is not a panacea. Adoption can be a difficult, time consuming, emotionally draining process filled with its own pitfalls and disappointments. The thought of going through the adoption process (homestudy, birth mother searches, psychological interviews, medical reports etc) can be overwhelming to a couple who are already emotionally drained from years of infertility.Beyond that, adoption, especially international adoptions, can cost $20,000+. (Interesting when you consider that Ms. Flowers suggests that spending money on IVF is somehow un-biblical because it is expensive).

The bottom line is - that she chose or through prayer was led to conclude that adoption was the way forward for her, and that she would not pursue IVF.

That's fine - that is what was right, for her. However, I think that is not necessarily the right thing for everyone, which is what she seems to suggest.

The book should be re-titled: " Infertility: How I found God's Peace in My Journey".

My favorite Christian Infertility Book!
Back in November of 2007, I went in to our local Berean bookstore, looking for one of the few pretty standard Christian Infertility Books (Hannah's Hope, The Infertility Companion, and a couple others are pretty "big"). I was annoyed to discover that Berean had only one book in the entire store on infertility (and for a moment, the store associate thought it was in the Parenting section. I was glad to find it in the "Women's Health" section instead). Anyway, I bought the book, stuffed it in my purse, and went on to meet a friend. When I got home, I logged on to Amazon and ordered those more "common" books and shoved this one to the back of my ever-growing pile. After all, I'd never heard of the book or the author, and had never seen it mentioned in any of my IF circles. I knew that it was recommended by Greg Smalley, and H. Norm Wright so I figured it couldn't be bad, but I still wasn't enthusiastic about reading it.

All those other books were great and I appreciate what I learned from them. I read through all of them and was left with just a couple more obscure titles, including this one. When I had to leave on a business trip, I tossed this book in my bag figuring it would give me something to do on the plane.

I started reading it and it wasn't long before I was hooked!

Infertility: Finding God's Peace in the Journey by Lois Flowers is a practical, Biblical guide book of the journey of Infertility, written for the IF Patients. As the author tells her story, she challenges the reader at every step with Biblical truths and logical challenges to the traps we often willingly fall victim to in our IF journeys that would seek to steal our joy and attention from God. She maintains a delicate balance of bold truth, and compassionate earnestness.

I've tried for a while to figure out why I like this book so much more than other books because really, what she says is not so profound that it's vastly different from other Christian books on the subject. I think I prefer this book because I appreciate the author's tone and approach. While other Christian Infertility books are very warm and almost personal, they appeal to the heart. They give me a sense of sitting and chatting over coffee, hugging and crying along the way. Those are wonderful elements of those books but for that reason, I never completely identified with them. I've done my share of crying no doubt, but at the end of the day I need help logically processing through everything.

This book appeals to the head and mind of the Infertility patient, which is much easier for me to identify with. I dogeared many many pages that contain content I've read before framed differently, but in this context the concepts reached out and grabbed me like they hadn't before in other mediums. My mind was challenged at every step, which in turn trained my heart. The author never allows the reader to just sit and stew in her own melancholy thoughts. She confronts prejudices, false entitlements and pity parties with the truth of God expressed with all the compassion of someone who knows the pain of this journey.

My favorite part of the book is when she quotes the Horse and His Boy by CS Lewis. I already have a soft spot for Lewis but the Horse and His Boy is a book I hadn't cracked since adolescence so I've forgotten much. In the passage cited, in an exchange between Aslan and a main character, the boy is asking the "Whys" of Aslan's workings in both his own life and that of a friend. Aslan answers:

Child...I am telling you your own story, not hers. I tell no one any story but his own.

Wow! Over and over I turned that in my head. This past fall I remember lamenting to my best friend that while I was overjoyed for her pregnancyI couldn't help but think that there must be some cosmic checklist that they accomplished and we didn't for God to decide that natural childbearing was a part of their story and not ours. In my head, there had to be some discriminating factor. I still saw infertility as incompleteness. As a blessing withheld. Childbearing was something they somehow deserved and we didn't, for reasons unbeknownst to any of us. That passage by Lewis and Ms. Flowers' excellent correspondence of it to the infertility journey continues to challenge me even now.

My other favorite part of the book is when the author is addressing the grief Infertility women often feel in modern Christendom, when motherhood is so magnified, and sometimes too much so. The Infertile woman is left feeling like the world thinks her life is "less blessed" or "less purposeful" and sometimes, she thinks those things about herself. The author writes:


I agree that children are wonderful blessings. If they were not, infertility wouldn't be nearly as hard as it is. I also understand why people with children might count them among the greatest blessings in their lives. But to suggest that people without children (married or not) are somehow missing out on the ultimate blessing is both narrow-minded and unbliblcal. The Scriptures (especially Psalms and Proverbs) list dozens of other sources of God's blessing. And nearly all of these have to do with a person's heart and relationship with God and others, rather than her ability to reproduce her own genetic material.

For example, you are blessed when you refrain from walking in the "counsel of the wicked" or standing "in the way of sinners" or sitting "in the seat of mockers" (Psalm 1:1). You're blessed when you delight in the law of the Lord and meditate on it around the clock (Psalm 1:2). You are blessed if your "transgressions are forgiven" and your "sins are covered" (Psalm 32:1). You're blessed when you take refuge in the Lord (Psalm 34:8), when you make the Lord your trust (Psalm 40:4), when you have regard for all the weak (Psalm 41:1), when you learn to acclaim the Lord and walk in His presence (Psalm 89:15), when you seek Him with all your heart (Psalm 119:2), when you maintain justice, and when you "constantly do what is right" (Psalm 106:3).

You're blessed when you are kind to the needy (Proverbs 14:21), when you are generous to the poor (Proverbs 22:9), when you are faithful (Proverbs 28:20), when you honor the Sabbath (Isaiah 56:3), when you are disciplined by God (Psalm 94:12), when you find wisdom (Proverbs 3:13), when you serve others (John 13:11-17), when you fear the Lord continually (Proverbs 28:14), when you read the book of Revelation and take its message to heart (Revelation 1:3-4) and when you actively watch for the return of Jesus Christ (Revelation 16:14-15).


The author goes on to share the beatitudes as well and finally concludes:

Notice that this passage says nothing about having children. Like most of the blessings delineated in the Old Testament, all the blessings here are a direct result of Christlike behavior, not of familial relationships.

God may not have blessed you with biological children yet. And He may never choose to do so. But regardless of whether you ever have a successful pregnancy, you have many other wonderful opportunities to receive His blessing, most of which can have eternal impact. In the meantime, you can either bemoan the fact that you're missing out on the blessing of children (either temporarily or permanently), or you can actively seek out ways to grow in purity and godliness, serve others and develop wisdom.



What a wonderful, exhaustive list of God's goodness and mercies! As a long term Christian, I knew all of these things, and I also know that I do not exist so that God may bless me, but that doesn't mean that I have always stopped my heart from wallowing in what I was bound to "miss out" on! This passage was such a challenge to me and I hope that it would be a challenge to our church culture too.

I really love this book. I want to find the author and hug her guts out. The book does have an appendix for family and friends of infertile people, as well as a resource for pastors, and those are well and good too, but this book was just so instrumental in shedding light on lies in my heart, in encouraging me in places where I felt a bit on shakey ground, and in challenging me to really appreciate this journey of Infertility.

I recommend it with my whole heart! Praise God for the "inconvenience" of Berean having only one book on the shelf. I am confident that it was so I would read this book that I otherwise would not have touched and I am so grateful for the gift it has been. I hope it will encourage you all likewise!

It's a blessing!
This book has been a great help.I am in the early stages of infertility. My husband and I have had so much pressure from family, friends and the church about when are you going to have a baby.I laughed and cried while reading it. Finally, I said to myself someone understands. Even if you just started on this "journey of infertility", I recommend it. The author does not leave you hopeless.She helped me to remember what is important while still validating my feelings.I cannot make having a baby my "idol". God is still good!

Wonderful resource
This book helped me immensely in bringing closure to our infertility journey and helped me find peace.It answered and helped explain many of the issues I had been dealing with while struggling with infertility.I definitely recommend it to anyone who asks God, "Why me?"However, I would like to add that you may want to wait to read it until you are near the end of infertility treatments and considering other options.It is very straightforward and may upset someone who is just starting off dealing with infertility.

No room for God's power
I read this book at a very low point in my fertility journey.After finishing this book, I felt like the the author left no room for God's power to work through any fertility situation.

I understand that she never conceived, and decided to adopt, but not all of us are there.I still feel that God can bring me a baby, even if I get to be as old as Sarah!I guess I didn't feel the same from this author. ... Read more

Product Description
To anyone living with the daily ache of infertility,Debra Bridwell offers encouragement and biblical direction.Bridwellwrites candidly of her struggle to have children, the cycle of hopeand grief, and the sorrow of pregnancy loss. The Ache for a Child alsooffers insights for those who ache with the infertile couple. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (9)

Horrible, Horrible, Horrible
This is the worst book I have ever read.Very discouraging.It is basically one woman's story of struggling to get pregnant.It is terribly out of date and down right depressing. I also found it quite meanspirited...one of the things said in the book was that scaring of the fallopian tubes could be a punishment from God for a bad lifestyle.I actually went and threw this book in the garbage.

No longer in print.Buy it while you can!
This book was life changing for me.At a time where I felt hopeless and could not find anyone who understood the depth of my grief, Debra Bridwell's words and experiences hit home and brought hope and healing.This book has had the single-most long term impact on my life, other than the Bible.While no longer in print, this one is worth picking up where ever you can find it!

Great book on infertility
This was a great book - there are discussion questions at the end of each chapter.The only thing we didn't like was that it was written for women, from a woman's point of view.We read the book together, and my husband felt men were stereotyped as being distant and unfeeling (which he is not).On the whole, the book was a good tool for us to get on the same page and have discussion.

Great for a christain woman when God seems so far
This book will re-energize the faith any christain woman who has been on her knees for long praying, and at some point asked "why God seems so far...?" The book explained that at this point, God is truly near and faithful no matter the pain of infertility.

A Godsend to those going through the hurdles of infertility
More than any other publication regarding infertility - Bridwell speaks from her heart and at times I felt as if she were speaking from mine. Bridwell not only describes her challenges and triumphs, but also focuses on how family and friends may offer support to a couple going through infertility.My husband and I have given copies of this book to our family members and closest friends - so that they may truly have a glimpse of what we are going through. ... Read more

Product Description
WINNER - NAPPA Award, FINALIST - Foreword Magazine Book-of-the-Year

"Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster" is written for anyone struggling with infertility. It's goal is to empower, educate, and advocate for the reader. This comprehensive guide offers invaluable information. Included are honest interviews and insights from people who have traveled on this roller coaster journey. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (8)

An Important Read
This book is an excellent guide to help individuals through the difficult decision making processes associated with the infertility ride.It is thoughtful, well written and informative.I encourage all to read this book before beginning the journey.Perhaps your rollercoaster will have a few less loops!
Mindy Berkson, Infertility Consultant
Lotus Blossom Consulting

Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster
Most of us (including both men and women) just assume that we'll someday have a child of our own. The thought that our life partner, ourself, or both may not be able to naturally conceive a child once we decide to have a family doesn't really cross our minds. Unfortunately, this is the reality that many men and women must face.

Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster is written by an individual who has lived through the issues of infertility for both men and women trying to cope with their own situations. Three things really stood out for me within this book: the author's compassion, the wide variety of potential strategies set out for those facing infertility, and that the book actually took into consideration how men feel about these issues. That there are lots of viable alternatives and that couples can take control of their therapy and decision making process is empowering during an otherwise very daunting time. Moreover, bringing couples together in understanding at such a difficult time can only make the relationship stronger.

A great look at the big and little issues with infertility treatment...
When I was undergoing fertility treatment with my first child, I didn't have a comprehensive resource to turn to for both the big, emotional issues, and the smaller, detail-oriented issues (like what to do with all the paperwork!) I could have really benefited from this book, and am glad it's now available for other women undergoing infertility treatment.

A complete guide to overcoming the inevitable hardships that dealing with infertility
In Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster: A Guide To Educate And Inspire, Iris Waichler draws upon her years of experience as a medical social worker to address the difficult emotional and physical health issues surrounding issue of infertility. Deftly providing readers through a sensitive understanding of the variety of infertility causes affecting men and women, Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster covers the issues of menopause, disclosure infertility and conception, parenting after infertility, how to find a doctor or lawyer, the psychology of infertility treatment, becoming a couple again, and the choice of a childless marriage. Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster is very strongly recommended for couples searching for a comprehensive grasp of infertility issues and is a complete guide to overcoming the inevitable hardships that dealing with infertility will inevitably encumber.

An Insightful Look at Infertility
'Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster' is a book that speaks not only to those directly affected by infertility, but to those of us who have family members and friends going through the highly emotional experience of treatment, high expectations, and a less than guaranteed outcome.

Waichler offers a comprehensive guide that allows readers to fully understand every aspect of the infertility experience.It is a support and reference guide that is written with heart, professionalism and a true sense of what it means to go through the journey. Hats off to Waichler and the many others who contributed in sharing their personal experiences and giving us some insight to this topic!

To anyone struggling to understand what it's all about; the legal and medical aspects, the financial and emotional issues, and most importantly, the growing number of options available,this is truly a worthwhile read! ... Read more

Product Description
This exceptional collection of essays breaks new ground by examining the global impact of infertility as a major reproductive health issue, one that has profoundly affected the lives of countless women and men. Based on original research by seventeen internationally acclaimed social scientists, it is the first book to investigate the use of reproductive technologies in non-Western countries. Provocative and incisive, it is the most substantial work to date on the subject of infertility.
With infertility as the lens through which a wide range of social issues is explored, the contributors address a far-reaching array of topics: why infertility has been neglected in population studies, how the deeply gendered nature of infertility sets the blame squarely on women's shoulders, how infertility and its treatment transform family dynamics and relationships, and the distribution of medical and marital power. The chapters present informed and sophisticated investigations into cultural perceptions of infertility in numerous countries, including China, India, the nations of sub-Saharan Africa, Vietnam, Costa Rica, Egypt, Israel, the United States, and the nations of Europe.
Poised to become the quintessential reference on infertility from an international social science perspective, Infertility around the Globe makes a powerful argument that involuntary childlessness is a complex phenomenon that has far-reaching significance worldwide. ... Read more

Product Description
EMPOWER YOURSELF! Completely Revised And Updated, 100 Questions & Answers About Infertility, Second Edition Is An Indispensible Resource For Both The Recently Diagnosed Infertility Patient And The Veteran Of Unsuccessful Treatments. Written In An Easy-To-Read Format, It Provides Authoritative, Practical Answers To The Most Commonly Asked Questions About Infertility. It Covers A Wide-Range Of Topics Including The Etiology, Diagnosis, And Therapies Available For Infertility. Additionally, The Appendix Features Key Information From The CDC-SART IVF Outcome. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (6)

Forget the Internet - BUY THIS BOOK!
You MUST read this book BEFORE you meet with your reproductive specialist or consider ANY kind of fertility treatment. When I originally started researching my infertility issues online in preparation for my consultation with a reproductive endocrinologist (RE), I quickly realized how much MISINFORMATION there is out there on the Web and these online fertility chat rooms where many women speak as if they have an MD by their name. When I was given a copy of Dr. Gordon and Dr. DiMattina's book, it was as if a light bulb suddenly turned on and all of my anxieties about fertility treatment went away. BECAUSE OF THIS BOOK, I was able to ask very detailed questions when I met with my RE for the first time...You have all of your answers right here in one source. The book is SO EASY to read and understand. It covers EVERYTHING from the basics of fertility to complicated treatment options...every question you can possibly imagine is covered in these pages. Despite my extensive research, I find myself going back to the book often and always learning something new. You will not regret making this purchase. Not only are Dr. Gordon and Dr. DiMattina top experts in their field, they tirelessly go above and beyond to educate all of their patients and answer their hundreds of questions individually. I cannot say enough good things about their book or their practice (Dominion Fertility in Arlington, VA), where I am a grateful patient.

Terrific book from terrific docs (I know - Dr. G was my doc!)
This is a terrific resource from two terrific doctors!Dr. Gordon was my RE and guided my husband and me through three IVF cycles which resulted in two spectacular little girls (now almost 5 and almost 3 1/2).The book provides intelligent, caring information - which is what I would expect from a doctor that is caring, kind and funny in person.Highly recommend the book, the blog and the Doctors.

Infertility FAQs in one neat package
When a couple is suffering through infertility, they have a million questions. Fertility Drs. Gordon and DiMattina attempt to cover the basics in a single, reliable source with 100 Questions & Answers About Infertility.

They start with the basics: What is infertility and what does normal reproduction look like? Then they move on to infertility evaluation and treatments. Next they touch on specific problems such as Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, Tubal Disease, Male Factor, and Endometriosis. They address treatment options, specifically Intrauterine Insemination, In Vitro Fertilization, and Third-Party Reproduction. They also answer questions regarding lifestyle (stress, exercise, etc.) in regard to reproduction, and finally they address pregnancy loss. There is also a plethora of statistical information.

If you find yourself in the throes of infertility and you are lost in the lingo, this book may be a good start. It will answer many clinical and technical questions you may have about your problem and where to start. This book will be especially helpful for those who have the conditions mentioned and those who want details on medical measures. It should also help you decide what steps you want to take in the process. The information seems, in my experience, to be accurate and up to date.

What this book won't do for you is answer the more emotional side of infertility. It won't tell you that taking Clomid might cause you to cry for weeks on end. It won't tell you that you will get pregnant. And it won't have a definitive answer for why you aren't achieving pregnancy when all the testing says there is no reason. However, this is a very informative book on many of the more common and clinical aspects of the process.

Armchair Interviews says: A book with answers to many questions some couples might have

A Must Read
What a great book!This book is a wonderful launching place for someone facing infertility and needing answers.I have already been through some treatments and learned new things reading this book.I liked that the definitions for words used in the text were right in the margin of the page.It is easy to follow, but the authors do not talk down to you.Good balance of information.

One stop shopping for all your questions
I've been having infertility issues for almost 6 years and I've purchased several on-topic books during this time. No book covers as much detailed information in as few pages at this one.I read the entire book the night I received it.The authors honestly acknowledge the frustrations accompanying the mysteries of fertility while outlining the proven medical procedures that lead to parenthood.My favorite thing about the book is that it assumes that the reader is an intelligent, resourceful patient who is approaching her infertility with a problem-solving mentality. I wish I had bought this years ago! ... Read more

Product Description
Meet nine girlfriends who've been through infertility treatment (IT) and can help make your IT easier by sharing what they learned. This is a candid, humorous description of what treatment is like from the patient s perspective. The girlfriends tell you who ll be touching you where, with what, why, and what it feels like, and give you practical tips on how to balance your life, handle the shots, ride the hormone roller coaster, play doctor roulette, cope with baby showers and pregnant friends, and keep the warmth in sex-on-schedule-all the stuff no one else talks about, especially your doctors. The girlfriends can t cure your infertility, but they can make your infertility treatment a whole lot better. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

An excellent resource
This is a well researched and written guide that takes you step by step through all the available infertiliy treatments. The guide has practical helpful advice from other women who have been through this experience making the book feel very real.It has the depth of a textbook with the shared experiences of a selection of 'girlfriends'and can be considered a must for those undergoing infertility treatments or to support friends or family who are.

Best in Category
Thank you, Elizabeth Dellenbaugh, for writing a genuinely helpful and informative book about going through infertility treatment that manages to be funny and compassionate at the same time - - just like your friends.If you read just one book on the topic, pick up this one.It's also the right one for husbands, siblings and friends of women going through infertility.

A fine account any general lending library will appreciate
The pros and cons of various infertility treatments lends to a fine advice guide on how to get through treatment while having a life. Nine girlfriends who've been through IT describe their experiences with humor and personal insights making for a fine account any general lending library will appreciate.
... Read more

Product Description
Fertility problems affect as many as one in three people in the Western world, and doctors are unable to find the cause in a third of the cases they treat. Conventional medical treatment can achieve spectacular results but it is invasive, expensive and not always available. Various natural therapies offer a safe and gentle alternative with a track record of success both in alleviating physical conditions and in dealing with mental and emotional stress. The experience of patients and practitioners combined with research results, helps you to choose the treatment or treatments most likely to work for you. In particular, this book covers the causes of infertility in both men and women; how you can help yourself; medical tests and treatments - what they are like, the likelihood of success and any side-effects or dangers; the natural therapies most likely to help; and how to find and choose a reliable practitioner. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (1)

Good buy for the money
This book is a good resource at a great price! The book has a lot of European research so it is sometimes hard to follow, but there is a great wealth of information regarding clinics across the globe in the back. Agreat asset to an infertility library. ... Read more

Product Description

Customer Reviews (67)

The self-absorption really gets to you after a while...
I thought I was going to love this book. It did make me laugh many times, and the writing itself is excellent. But after a while, the author's incredible, abject self-absorption really started to wear on me. The way she treated her husband was absolutely objectionable; at many points in reading the book, I found myself marveling that they are apparently still together.

Like some other reviewers, I also found it offensive that she approached adoption as an option that was at best a distant second to bearing her own child, and something that can be pursued (and discontinued) at whim rather than with serious commitment. (This is offensive to me on a personal level; I have had one child who died at birth, and I don't know if we can have another child who will be healthy. I would love, love, love to be able to afford adoption! I just want to be a mom to a living child! Reading about someone just throwing away an opportunity like that really gets under my skin.) Beyond that personal issue, I just kept thinking, "Why not put all that money and energy toward adoption?" It doesn't make sense -- well, actually, it does. It's an issue of self-absorption and privilege. I guess the author is privileged enough to turn away adoption and just keep hammering away at IVF/etc.

WARNING, SPOILER ABOUT THE ENDING OF THE BOOK TO FOLLOW:

And finally, my last critique: The author claims not to support the idea/cliche that "once you stop trying, you get pregnant naturally," and yet that's exactly what happens to her. The resolution to all the madness throughout the entire book is that she gets pregnant naturally and has a beautiful baby girl, finally, at long last. And...The End. But what would have happened if Daisy had not been conceived and born? Would Peggy Orenstein still be a bossy, manipulative, lying, self-absorbed maniac, still trying to get pregnant by any means necessary? It felt like there was absolutely no growth. She just blazed around like a tornado for six years, abusing her husband and her body and the people who tried to help her achieve her goal of motherhood (scratch that: her goal of pregnancy), and then suddenly, unexpectedly, she was handed this gift -- a healthy child of her own.

I guess I read this book hoping for a view into what happens if you find out that you *can't* bear a healthy child. What then? How do you live with it? How do you move forward? Those questions are completely unanswered by this memoir.

Transcends the subject matter
I read this book while experiencing infertility and found it incredibly refreshing to read such an honest, angry, textured piece.The madness and selfishness of the author are laid bare as well as her humor and sense of adventure.It felt good to read the words of someone who had all the same angry wistfulness I was experiencing, yet with exotic backdrops!As a matter of fact I liked it well enough to re-read it three kids later when I was no longer angry or wistful and it was still absolutely spellbinding.Orentstein lays out all her dark feelings and actions and more importantly, her darkness is INTERESTING.

My only complaint is that it contains the now seemingly requisite "and after all this, I ended up getting pregnant with no help at all while trying to adopt" ending.I realize that it was TRUE in this case, but of course it is also unlikely to happen to anyone else.

Couldn't like the author
This was not an uplifting book. I would not recommend it. It was the kind of book that I read in two sittings: half in one day, half the next. And it was interesting. But the more I read the book, the less I liked the author/protagonist, and the more I felt like this book damages the kind of women who want nothing more than to have children, but can't yet. Peggy does not fall into that category.

The main problem was that I didn't like the author. My husband has this issue with books, too: if he doesn't somehow sympathize or understand the protagonist, it's hard for him to read the book. Actually, those are not his most important qualifiers: he has to LIKE the protagonist. Maybe he would not do the same things, maybe he doesn't agree with his reasoning etc. But he has to like him or her. If he doesn't, it's hard to enjoy the book.

I hadn't really thought of it that way before, but I think he's totally right. I enjoy books where I like the protagonist. Books where I don't are difficult to enjoy. Usually books that High School English teachers force upon you have crummy unlikable protagonists, which is one reason it's so hard to get "into" those books.

Lots and lots of people will disagree with us as to the validity of this criterion. That's fine. I am totally okay with you reading books with protagonists you don't like. If I read one, I reserve the right to turn the last page with the final feeling of, "Well, that was kind of a waste of time." Which is how I feel about this book, and why I ultimately would not recommend it.

I think the reason I finished it was because Peggy does an excellent job of storytelling; I wanted to find out what happened to her, even though I didn't like her. But by the end, I really didn't like her. The ending was a let down because she doesn't really end up changing very much.

First, here's what I liked about the book: she came across as extremely honest and self-introspective. It must have taken some serious chutzpa to write this book. Some of the things she went through on her infertility journey were really terrible and sad. I liked that she had the guts to express her true feelings, unmasked. If I met her in real life, I would probably like her.

Here's what I dislike about the book: She is a feminist hypocrite, who claims that women should be able to choose to be or do whatever they want, unless it's motherhood because who would choose to give up their individuality and freedom and careers and life, willingly? She is annoyed that it is something that we would never consider asking our husbands to do, using that as rationale for demeaning and making fun of homemakers (which she does early on in the book - even by her own reckoning!). It's pretty annoying that a seemingly intelligent woman could be so blind to the hypocrisy of this worldview. "You can be anything you want to be, except if it interferes with my social agenda." Right.

Also, I'm a bit torn between my appreciation for her candor and my general view that writing about explicit marital problems is Too Much Information. I think I generally lean towards the TMI side. The other books in this genre of infertility-journey-memoirs that I have read (only two others, granted) gave their spouses barely any page-time, which I realize is also absurd, and I also criticize. But it's not really a good thing to pen down arguments with your husband for millions of readers to examine, at least in my opinion. I mean, there is no way I would do that to my husband. I don't even write down our disagreements in my journal. It's not worth preserving. Yet she does this. Doesn't this make her husband Steven feel like crap, having these exposed to the whole world? And what is with the title, "One woman's Quest to become a mother"? Shouldn't he be included in there, too?

What else do I not like? As a character, Peggy is extremely wishy-washy and indecisive, all the while trying to convince herself that she is not. I'm not even sure at the end of the book if she realizes how wishy-washy she had been through her whole journey. When I say "wishy-washy", I mean, she claims she wants a baby, but then she doesn't, then she does, then she doesn't, then she does - then she claims she wants to be a mother, but the same thing: a long circle of doubt. Sure, it's honest to dissect these feelings, but it doesn't make me like her. In fact, it mostly led me to view her as a sad, lost, Godless person who tries to be honest with herself, but ultimately fails because clinging to her "feminist ideals" is somehow more important.

One poignant part of the book was when she goes to visit an old friend who has become an extreme ultra-orthodox Jew. His family now has 15 kids. She describes becoming overwhelmed being around so many people, so much that she has to leave and just sit by herself in the bathroom for a while. She later explains these feelings away, never really coming to terms with her inner desire to be a mother, because she has grown up thinking that that feeling is repressive and wrong. Obviously this is just my own personal interpretation of the scene, but I think that reaction had a lot more to do with her being extremely sad and jealous of what she has missed out on, having put her career in front of a natural God-given drive to be a mother until she was in her mid/late-thirties. I think she was just kidding herself when she wrote off this family's' choices as being crazy and way too absurd for her to handle. I think it was a coping mechanism, so she wouldn't have to blame herself and deal with the fact that in many ways, her choice to shun motherhood and view it as a burden and somehow "anti-women" had actually left her feeling empty and alone.

The point is, she never admits that she made the wrong choice, or that she would do things differently. To have gone through such an insane journey and not wish she would have chosen differently makes no sense to me.

I learned some interesting things from reading this book: some things about Japanese culture and history, lots of things about IVF, and some deplorable things about the difficulty of the international adoption process. Really, though, I feel bummed that this lady didn't change more in the end. She kept me hoping until the second to last page!

This is why I didn't like Peggy as a protagonist: I am a 23 year old who just barely graduated from BYU, and she is a 40-something year old with a degree (possibly multiple degrees) and a successful writing/journalism career; shouldn't she be wiser and smarter than me? Yet I felt like she was just so completely unwise and ignorant, reading how she actively didn't want children, how she still clung to her hypocritical feminist ideals even at the end of a long, terrible, six-year journey through infertility hell. I mean, just the fact that I know that I want children, while she struggled, no WRESTLED with even admitting this about herself, made it very hard for me to respect her, let alone like her. Maybe I'm the shallow, unwise, ignorant woman who believes that somewhere inside all women is a God-given desire to be a mother. Mostly, it was frustrating that she couldn't even really admit this desire to herself, when clearly it's what she wanted. She wouldn't have gone through the misery she endured (including 3 miscarriages!) without that desire. But she couldn't admit it on paper.

I do like at the end that she says that she likes being a mom. One sentence, quickly followed with a bitter resentment towards how women seem to HAVE to add, "it's the best job ever," in order to justify its worth. Stupid, stupid! It IS the best job. People don't just say that, some people actually mean it! Like my friend Cindy said, "You're telling me that a job as a manager at blockbuster (her job for several years) is supposed to be more worthwhile than being a stay home mom?!?" But probably Peggy puts her kid in daycare, since she still actively pursues her career ambitions. It would be an annoying ending, if she went through all that just to choose to let somebody else spend most of the day raising the kid.

I think that if I'm going to continue reading books in the infertility-memoirs genre, I will try to find something that is written by a younger, non-Jew (not that that really had much to do with the reason I disliked Peggy, although she admits her heritage has a lot to do with her kvetching-filled attitudes - mostly it was her secular attitude towards life that bugged me; it would have been the same if she were an agnostic or athiest) who actually KNOWS she wants to be a mother from page one. Someone who fully values motherhood and the desire to be a mother, without caveats and exceptions, or worries that doing so will somehow taint the "holy" feminist doctrines. If there even is such a book. Sheesh.

Another main grumble I have about this book is the effect it could have on those women who actually yearn to be a mom more than anything, from the first time they try to conceive. Whether or not her age and wishy-washyness actually played a major factor in her infertility, this book perpetuates the total myth that infertility is a problem which only effects older women and men. She also never admits that she may have been wrong to wait. And it doesn't seem she would advise others to do differently than she did, either. It probably already sucks enough to deal with infertility without having all of this horrible stigma ("you brought it on yourself by waiting", etc.) even more permanently attached, which is something that this book could do. Mostly, it does more to alienate and isolate those few women who yearn for an at-present unattainable motherhood. If they don't agree with Peggy (and other authors in this genre), their feelings are somehow invalid or less valued or whatever...and that is hogwash.

Inspirational and theraputic
I enjoyed this book and felt that it allowed me some foresight into the patience that should come with a planned pregnancy.I'm in my late 20s, have been trying to concieve with my husband for over a year with no luck and have been distraught over what is wrong with me.All of my doctors state that I'm fully capable of bearing a child, so, why the hesitation on my body's pary?After I read this book, I felt much more at ease.It made me realize that the whole experience is something that millions of women go through and that when you try to plan your life, things aren't always on target.With life, you've gotta roll with everything and know that good things will come in due time.

Very therapeutic
We have only been trying for 10 months, and even got pregnant once which I miscarried at 8 weeks.But sure enough, I got worried after 3 months, since I am 36, and the fertility doctor I saw completely assured me that worrying was a good thing at my age.He wanted to start treatment right away.After miscarrying, I read a ton of books, and this one was my last one.When I started reading, I first thought "mmmmh, not really much information in here," however, I could not stop reading.Her writing is fantastic, truly therapeutic since I could compare myself to so many details she describes.At one point, she talks about Chlomid and it upset me a bit since I don't agree with her.However, I am now glad I finished reading.It isn't so much about little details or the choices she made. For me it was about calming me down and reassuring me that I was on the right path.The ending is unexpected, but wonderful and totally makes sense.Another important part is that last chapter where she brings the statistics.One intersting thing is that apparently 90% of couples in their late 30s get pregnant on their own within two years!Two years and 90%!When you go to any fertility clinic and are over 35, they will tell you to start treatment after only half a year!How insane is this.I also like when she compared fertility doctors to salesmen.And I don't want to be disrespectful, I truly belief there is place for fertility specilist and they can and should help when truly needed.But from my own experience, it all comes down to money. I felt like a number whenever I entered the clinic and did some tests/treatments, they just follow procedure and never has anybody even looked at my charts of the last months. However, really liked the book! ... Read more

Product Description
1. Introduction, 2. Physiology of Reproduction, 3. Causes of Infertility, 4. Investigations in Management of Infertility, 5. Ultrasound Assessment of the Male Partner, 6. Assessment of the Female Reproductive Tract, 7. Vaginal and Cervical Factor Infertility Evaluation, 8. Uterine Factor Assessment and Evaluation, 9. Tubal Evaluation, 10. Ovarian Evaluation by Ultrasound, 11. Color Doppler in Female Infertility. ... Read more