Product Description

Customer Reviews (245)

How to raise quiet, manipulative christian kids
- Some good points in the book but a writing style that would even make Kathy Lee Gifford gag.

- Not sold as a "Christian" book but is heavily slanted that way.

Overall, I feel these techniques, if taken as the absolute facts in which they are portrayed, will make your children quiet, well behaved, law abiding and brain dead.It claims to encourage thinking for yourself but if someone gives you two choices that amount to the same thing, are you thinking for yourself or just being manipulated?And you're being taught how to manipulate others.Most of their advice boils down to saying "You can walk to your room or I can carry you there" rather than "Go to your room."All of the better advice in the book can be found in many better books.

Parenting with Love and Logic
Wish I had this book 10 years ago before my youngest children were born...or even before my teenagers were born!Simple, easy to use methods to interact with your children that don't involve yelling (or even raising your voice).The hardest part is getting rid of my old habits in order to incorporate the ones from the book that actually work!This book has been a Godsend!

Amazing!
I Love this book! the principles are really so simple but so effective! I can see the difference in my kids already.

Terrible Advice for parenting
I'm horrified, no...saddened, that so many reviewers have rated this book so highly. What kind of children are we raising in society if these are the methods many think sound sensible.
My review is not as sophisticatedly sounding as the other 1-starers. And, I refuse to waste too much of my time, reviewing this book as I did reading it.
Let me just simply say.... the book should have been called: "Parenting to develop children with the character of a marshmellow".

a realistic and helpful parenting book
My husband and I took the Love and Logic class to help us with our eight-year-old son, who was talking back A LOT.The class was good, and inspired the purchase of this book.The book has proven quite effective, getting my husband and me on the same page (no pun intended!) so we can be consistent in our discipline.Love and Logic is about giving kids choices, therefore some control, and holding them accountable.We have been slowly implementing the ideas and are having success!!I would definitely recommend this book, but suggest taking the class if you have the opportunity, to give you the background knowledge to support your learning. ... Read more

Product Description
How many parents have found themselves thinking: I can't believe I just said to my child the very thing my parents used to say to me! Am I just destined to repeat the mistakes of my parents? In Parenting from the Inside Out, child psychiatrist Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., and early childhood expert Mary Hartzell, M.Ed., explore the extent to which our childhood experiences actually do shape the way we parent. Drawing upon stunning new findings in neurobiology and attachment research, they explain how interpersonal relationships directly impact the development of the brain, and offer parents a step-by-step approach to forming a deeper understanding of their own life stories, which will help them raise compassionate and resilient children.

Born out of a series of parents' workshops that combined Siegel's cutting-edge research on how communication impacts brain development with Hartzell's thirty years of experience as a child-development specialist and parent educator, Parenting from the Inside Out guides parents through creating the necessary foundations for loving and secure relationships with their children. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (37)

Excellent read, stunningly provocative and forward thinking!
Seigel is an amazing author with fascinating insight into the mind and body connections and the importance of attachment. This is a great read even for someone who is not yet a parent, but wanting to prepare themselves to healthfully connect with others.

Children, people, communities that thrive
Whether you are a parent or not this book is an outstanding read.It is a collaborative work with Daniel Siegel, MD and Mary Hartzell, M.Ed.Simplified read for healing the child within as well as learning new ways to parent our children so they thrive, which ultimately creates a community that thrives.This is a book that will assist anyone that wishes to change the ways in which we understand our experiences and how that understanding creates the quality of relationships we have in the present.It truly offers what the subtitle reads: How a deeper self-understanding can help you raise children who thrive.I would give it a 10 star were it available.

Great Book
This book is very interesting and provides a very useful and unique perspective to parenting.

Recognizing and Dealing with the internal Father and Mother
The majority of the grown-ups have vowed never to do and treat their children they way their own parents treated them. Unfortunately, it is not so simple.All of this history has been internalized and is below the level of our awareness.This book gives accurate keys to revealing our `internalized - shadow - parent' and dealing with them.The authors understand our problem and point to very helpful methods of creating the change in the parent model and translating it into simple behavioral approaches with their child.They do a very good job of this.An easy-read, they have simplified a great of technical, psychological material and made it accessible to the average lay person.This is a great book that should be on your parenting library shelf to refer to again and again.

Jeffrey L. Fine, PhD, Psychologist:Author of: -
"The Art of Conscious Parenting"

The BEST parenting book out there!
If you can handle some somewhat heavy, technical reading, I believe the heart and soul of this book will shout out loud and clear: Emotional Intelligence and the understanding of Attachment Theory is key to becoming a great parent. As a Christian counselor focused on a developmental perspective, I spend a good deal of my time with the youth and family population. I am also an EMDR therapist working with adolescents and adults with issues of childhood trauma. Multi generational patterns, family systems issues and attachment/relational styles play a key role in effective parenting and this book does a wonderful job of illuminating us to these facts. I plan on using this book as a meaningful reference in my upcoming classes and seminars. An excellent follow up read is "Why You Do The Things You Do" by Dr. Tim Clinton and Dr. Gary Sibcy. ... Read more

Product Description
Today’s busier, faster society is waging an undeclared war on childhood. With too much stuff, too many choices, and too little time, children can become anxious, have trouble with friends and school, or even be diagnosed with behavioral problems. Now internationally renowned family consultant Kim John Payne helps parents reclaim for their children the space and freedom that all kids need for their attention to deepen and their individuality to flourish. Simplicity Parenting offers inspiration, ideas, and a blueprint for change:
 
• Streamline your home environment. Reduce the amount of toys, books, and clutter—as well as the lights, sounds, and general sensory overload.
• Establish rhythms and rituals. Discover ways to ease daily tensions, create battle-free mealtimes and bedtimes, and tell if your child is overwhelmed.
• Schedule a break in the schedule. Establish intervals of calm and connection in your child’s daily torrent of constant doing.
• Scale back on media and parental involvement. Manage your children’s “screen time” to limit the endless deluge of information and stimulation.

A manifesto for protecting the grace of childhood, Simplicity Parenting is an eloquent guide to bringing new rhythms to bear on the lifelong art of raising children. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (20)

It's OK to slow down
This book has been such an encouragment for me as a parent. In each chapter I feel like the author is telling me it's okay to slow down and not be apart of the rat race. My children do not need to be involved in everything (sports, clubs, etc).

Amazing Parenting Book
This is BY FAR one of the best parenting books I have read (and I read A LOT!)It is well written and well organized with so many tangible ideas for parents.So often I will read a parenting book that sounds great in theory but offers no real "concrete" ideas for parents to implement.This book has definitely rewired my brain in how I approach my children and parenting them in general.

life changing
This book was recommended to me on several occasions.I have wanted to simplify for years but wasn't sure where to start or how to stay on task.I am empowered to get it done and feel more free to live.I can see how my more calm collected feelings have had positive impacts on my kids and it has only been a few weeks.

Simplicity Parenting
This is a beautiful work of supporting and instructing parents to enjoy parenting more as they make room for their family life and childhood to unfold in a organic way.

Mental Detox for Children
We live in a world where too much of everything is the norm and where, unfortunately, simplicity is seen by far too many people as an 'alternative' way of living rather than as a mindful approach to life. Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids is an important addition to the growing body of books and programs that promote a common-sense-approach to parenting.

I recently browsed through this book because a friend who had bought it for her daughter (with three children) asked for my opinion. Simplicity Parenting should be compulsory reading for many parents, especially for those who may blame society or lack of discipline or whatever else is convenient to blame for their children's undesirable behavior.

As an author who has written a book about how to `declutter' and `detox' the mind with the help of simple and mindful strategies, I couldn't help thinking that Simplicity Parenting is a wonderful companion to my own book (and vice versa).

Christine Maingard, Author of Think Less Be More:Mental Detox for Everyone [...] ... Read more

Product Description
You Can Start a Revolution in Your Family . . . Tonight

ScreamFree Parenting is not just about lowering your voice. It’s about learning to calm your emotional reactions and learning to focus on your own behavior more than your kids’ behavior . . . for their benefit. Our biggest enemy as parents is not the TV, the Internet, or even drugs. Our biggest enemy is our own emotional reactivity. When we say we “lost it” with our kids, the “it” in that sentence is our own adulthood. And then we wonder why our kids have so little respect for us, why our kids seem to have all the power in the family.

It’s time to do it differently. And you can. You can start to create and enjoy the types of calm, mutually respectful, and loving relationships with your kids that you’ve always craved. You can begin to revolutionize your family, starting tonight.

Parenting is not about kids, it’s about parents.
If you’re not in control, then you cannot be in charge.
What every kid really needs are parents who are able to keep their cool no matter what.

Easier said than done? Not anymore, thanks to ScreamFree Parenting, the principle-based approach that’s inspiring parents everywhere to truly revolutionize their family dynamics. Moving beyond the child-centered, technique-based approaches that ultimately fail, the ScreamFree way compels you to:

focus on yourself
calm yourself down, and
grow yourself up

By staying calm and connected with your kids, you begin to operate less out of your deepest fears and more out of your highest principles, revolutionizing your relationships in the process.

ScreamFree Parenting is not just another parenting book. It’s the first parenting
book that maintains—from beginning to end—that parenting is NOT about kids . . . it’s about parents. As parents pay more attention to controlling their own behavior instead of their kids’ behavior, the result is stronger, more rewarding, and more fulfilling family relationships.

For those of you reading who are parents, know parents, or have had parents, the notion that the greatest thing you can do for your children is to learn to focus on yourself may sound strange, even heretical. It’s not. Here’s why: we are the only ones we can control. We cannot control our kids—we cannot control the behavior of any other human being. And yet, so many “experts” keep giving us more tools (“techniques”) to help us try to do just that. And, of course, the more we try to control, the more out of control our children become.

“Don’t make me come up there.” “Don’t make me pull this car over.” “How many times do I have to tell you?” Even our language suggests that our kids have control over us.
It’s no wonder that we end up screaming. Or shutting down. Or simply giving up. And the charts, refrigerator magnets, family meetings, and other techniques in most typical parenting books just don’t work. They end up making us feel more frustrated and more powerless in this whole parenting thing.

This practical, effective guide for parents of all ages with kids of all ages introduces proven principles for overcoming the anxieties and stresses of parenting and setting new patterns of connection and cooperation. Well-written in an engaging, conversational tone, the book is sensible, straightforward, and based on the experiences of hundreds of actual families. It will help all parents become calming authorities in their homes, bring peace to their families today, and give kids what they need to grow into caring, self-directed adults tomorrow. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (137)

bear with it, the content is worth the time
I've screamed at my kids in every way possible.I've felt like there is nothing I can do to be heard by my kids or change their behavior.This book helps you take a step back from all the anxiety and take a breath.It is better to change your attitude and relationship with the kids late than never.Bear with the clumsy writing style, and look for the priceless message.And read the WHOLE book!Every chapter has something valuable.As a bonus, look up a pdf 'Rules for Making Rules' by Dr. Carstens.Kids truly respond to the calm and benevolent authority.

Cool Parenting Style
An insightful read, SCREAMFREE PARENTING progressed from humorous tone to a philosophical analysis on the subject of parenting, offering action plans to replace screaming voices with calming, peaceful & respectful one to raise children and grow well-rounded family members including parents themselves. As a family is born, growing up involves parents as well, Hal Runkel, the author and family therapist reminding us.There are real-life stories to read and ideas to put to good use, but most importantly, the book in its four parts on "Becoming Cool, Creating Space, Creating Place and Putting Yourself into Practice" will explain WHY we need to stay focused on screamfree parenting for our kids. This crucial understanding deepens the meaning and facilitates a calm and caring household.

Better suited for parenting teenagers?Not young kids.
If you have young children, don't bother with this book.Like others have said the whole book can be summed up in the title...don't scream. Translated:keep your cool, your kids don't have a remote control to your emotions and by staying calm you show that you're in charge.I found Hal Runkel's style meandering, pointless, stretching to find many ways to say the same thing.He gives extreme examples (the power of language...yes kids repeat things, but sometimes I LOVE hearing my messages repeated that I was thinking weren't getting through...but the stupid example about the girl who told the wheelchair-bound person that he didn't eat his vegetables?Maybe there was another teachable moment there.)He lacks actionable advice, i.e., tell me how to keep my cool...maybe deep breaths, counting?(To name a couple of ho-hum things I can think of).

I suppose he believes that calming your anxiety about their choices is one way to keep "screamfree."Give your child space... "calm your anxiety about their messy room...whenever you feel anxious about their mess, go clean your own room." Perhaps he thinks that I should let my far-sighted daughter suffer the consequence of not being able to find her eyeglasses anywhere, or not remembering where she left them. Now, I didn't scream or shout over that incident, but it's still a little ludicrous that he suggest that at a young age (6), I'm leaving her to her own devices.

There's something....missing.Runkel doesn't address differences in personality or ages.I certainly think not all parenting is cookie-cutter and that it changes as years progress and as situations and inputs change.And while I think the message is fine:don't scream, there's a lot more to consider when you're parenting. Give them space is fine I suppose, but only after you've laid all the groundwork and you can reasonably feel that they have the tools to make their own decision, only THEN you can say "I'm here if you need my help" (as he suggests as part of being "screamfree") and only THEN let go of some anxiety because you know you did your job.

Amazing Insights
This is a breath of fresh air in an overcrowded market of family/education books. Trully amazing.

Perfect
Yes it is not a recipe book. It doesn'ttell you what is the right thing to do in every case. If such a thing was possible parenting would be as easy as making french toast. It tells you how to FIND the best way to deal with the situation. The best way for you and your child in yourparticular situation. It offers you to grow, to be responsible for you own actions and to raise happier children. It says that you need to work on yourself, your reactions and expectations. It was very helpful for me. If you need a book of 100 tips look elsewhere. Good luck! ... Read more

Product Description

Have you ever stepped back to watch what really goes on when your children play? As psychologist Lawrence J. Cohen points out, play is children’s way of exploring the world, communicating deep feelings, getting close to those they care about, working through stressful situations, and simply blowing off steam. That’s why “playful parenting” is so important and so successful in building strong, close bonds between parents and children. Through play we join our kids in their world–and help them to

• Express and understand complex emotions
• Break through shyness, anger, and fear
• Empower themselves and respect diversity
• Play their way through sibling rivalry
• Cooperate without power struggles

From eliciting a giggle during baby’s first game of peekaboo to cracking jokes with a teenager while hanging out at the mall, Playful Parenting is a complete guide to using play to raise confident children. Written with love and humor, brimming with good advice and revealing anecdotes, and grounded in the latest research, this book will make you laugh even as it makes you wise in the ways of being an effective, enthusiastic parent.Amazon.com Review
Tag, you're it! In Playful Parenting, Lawrence Cohen demonstrates that parents need to lighten up and spend a few hours giggling with their kids. Play is inherently educational for children, he claims, and parents can learn plenty by examining the games kids play--from peekaboo to practical jokes.

Cohen is quick to point out that no matter what your child's temperament, she has a playful side. In its most basic form, play is a way to communicate. The author examines, with plenty of hilarious personal anecdotes, the details of play at every age and across genders. From his daughter and a new male friend discussing how "cool" nuclear weapons are and how "gross" a love song is, to a younger childzooming full-speed around a park at a birthday party, we're shown the exuberant truth behind playing: not only is it just plain fun, it can spark a variety of important sensations. One short section discusses the common phenomenon of happy giggling turning instantly to tears. Cohen suggests that "the fun play opens the emotional door to let out the giggles, and a flood of other feelings come pouring out after." Some specific ideas for games are included, and you'll find recommendations for everything from play wrestling to gentle storytelling. One chapter focuses on how to cope with play you don't find enjoyable, and how learning to appreciate these games can lead to surprising emotional insights. This is where Cohen's years of practice come in handy--it may be true that we all play, but not everyone immediately grasps the underlying messages. This is not simply a book filled with family activities, but rather an exploration of play for all ages. --Jill Lightner ... Read more

Customer Reviews (59)

So much more than playfulness!
Its easy to WANT to be more fun when it comes to parenting, but the hard part for me was how to go about it. I bought this book hoping it would give me some good ideas. It exceeded my expectations! This book isn't just about being a fun, playful parent, it's so much more. Its about learning how to connect with your child, how to read your childs feelings and insecurities, and how to get them to learn to express their feelings in a safe, communicative way. All of the ideas and information was new to me and very fascinating. The book is written and organized well. The author provides plenty of anecdotes and examples of ways to connect with your child. I didn't feel like I was reading a book of ideas with no way to illustrate them as I have with other parenting books. I learned actual ways to connect. Highly recommended, I will be definately be reading this one again when my babies are a few years older!

Best Parenting Book I've Read
I've read so many parenting books - looking for something that my heart agrees with and something that provides practical parenting advice - this does both.I love it and highly recommend it!

Very Insightful, Helps me manage my irritation/frustration with my toddler
This book is a sanity-saver.When you realize your child's "bad" behavior/acting up is no reason to despair or yell, and begin to see the real reasons they might be behaving obnoxiously, you automatically become much more compassionate, level-headed, and effective in your responses.It takes some getting used to, but play IS a better way to parent, even when you're feeling overwhelmed and in no mood to play.

One of the more eye-opening points for me is that when a parent is in punishment or overreaction mode, it's often an adult temper tantrum (parent isn't getting his/her way - even if they're right - so they have a fit that may or may not physically resemble the child's but is essentially the same thing:an emotional blow-up to either attempt to control the situation or inappropriately express anger/frustration).So true for me.Cohen's words and examples showed me (gently) how, in addition to being ineffective (which I had figured out, prompting me to buy the book), my reactions to my child's behavior are often immature and unfair.That was unexpected!It made a huge difference in my relationship with my child.

He quotes the physician's oath to "First, do no harm" and considers it a basic tenet of parenting.I feel like the reduction in my yelling/punishing and increase in my playfulness is not only avoiding further harm, but helping her in her development as well.And I'm much happier, too.I still lose my temper and yell sometimes, of course, but the time it takes to rebound back to a calm, gentle mommy has been reduced tremendously, and I always acknowledge to my child that I shouldn't have behaved that way and that I'm sorry.Modeling the kind of behavior you want to see in your child is considered one of the most important ways to teach your children, and now I practice what I was once so good at only preaching.

Best Parenting Book Ever
I've read lots of books on parenting, and if I had to recommend just one book to anybody it would be this one. I have it on paper and on my kindle, so I can access it anytime.

I have a 2.5 years old son and since I read this book our relationship has improved so much that is unbelievable. We are way closer now and he is a much happier joyful kid, and so am I!!

gave me good, simple ideas
I got this book from the library and then purchased it. it gave me good simple ideas to help me be more playful and allow my son to feel powerful through play. ... Read more

Product Description

Parents in our post-modern world tend to be committed to but anxious about their child-rearing responsibilities. They've tried the countless parenting books on the market, but many of these are strident, fear-based books that loving parents instinctively reject, while still searching for direction.

Now Dr. Tim Kimmel, founder of Family Matters ministries, offers a refreshing new look at parenting. Rejecting rigid rules and checklists that don't work, Dr. Kimmel recommends a parenting style that mirrors God's love, reflects His forgiveness, and displaces fear as a motivator for behavior. As we embrace the grace God offers, we begin to give it-creating a solid foundation for growingmorally strong and spiritually motivated children.

Releasing in an affordable trade paper edition, this revolutionary bookpresents a whole new way to nurture a healthy family.

Customer Reviews (41)

Legalism by Another Name
Sadly Dr. Kimmel creates his own legalistic approach to parenting where if you raise your children any other way, or in certain ways, you are legalistic and not showing grace to your children.My favorite example of this is his reaction to scheduled feeding.I understand that there are methods out there that advocate strict schedules, which are not healthy, but Dr. Kimmel wants to throw the baby out with the bath water.

Also, I fail to understand how anyone would advocate such loose boundaries as he does for their teenagers in a culture where more and more teens are getting pregnant and engaging in any number of harmful activities that will affect them for the rest of their lives.To say nothing of the spiritual impact such actions have.Call me legalistic for setting stricter boundaries for my children, I don't care.Child development specialists know that setting the bar of expectations high does not discourage children, it makes the level of failure that much less destructive when it comes to behavior.This is not earning brownie points, it is putting forth effort toward habits that will be more productive spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

His is a perspective only, and one should read this with the knowledge that Dr. Kimmel is reacting to his own "legalistic" upbringing, not necessarily writing from a theological perspective as he suggests.One would be better served by reading such Christian authors as Dr. Sears or someone else who actually has a background in childhood development, but is not overly influenced by a permissive culture or their own childhood baggage.

This is not grace, it is symbolism over substance--righteousness without holiness.

Encouraging
Unlike other books on Child-raising, this one was full of the hopeful possibilities inherent in just waking up and paying attention to your children.I recommend it not only as an help for learning how to raise kids, but also for anyone who has trouble understanding and incorporating Grace into their lives.

Never hurts to read another parenting book.
This book is about parenting with grace. It's about preparing your kids for the world and not preparing the world for your kids.The author warns us against the pitfalls of legalistic decision making. He is clearly pro-public schools and anti-private, almost to the point of insulting those who have chosen private. Although he emphasizes the concept of keeping your home grace-based, there aren't a lot of examples of what that really looks like. The book was o.k. if you are not a sensitive private-schooling family.

One of the best out there
Excellent book and well thought out. Clearly did his homework. Doesn't try to use the Bible to push a style of parenting like another popular book does.

blessing of a book
love the book and is blessing my parenting and giving me a whole new perspective on things! ... Read more

Product Description

Customer Reviews (58)

Priceless! Rules to LIVE by.
This book is definitely the one to live by if you want to raise responsible, caring, and independent children! It's a struggle to change how you've lived in the past, but having this book at your side will keep you on track. My daughter was very surprised when I told her I was only going to be her 'consultant' on issues that came up everyday, and I let her know that I trusted her to make the correct decisions after asking my advice. She knows she will have to deal with the consequences that arise from her choices. I believe that this will get her ready for being on her own soon!

Excellent!
Practical and insightful.Many good ideas in the book.If you need some ideas to help your teenager or soon-to-be teenager become responsible before and after leaving home, this book will give you great ideas, including sample conversations to model.

Good book
Helped me to stop hovering over my child and give him the freedom to make his own choices.Great help.

This book hits you right between the eyes, where you need it!
I highly recommend this book to parents, grandparents, and anyone else involved with teens and pre-teens. It contains hard-hitting examples and advice for dealing with "teen-age thinking" in such a way as to encourage teens' development of responsibility for their own actions and making plans for the consequences of their choices. I bought it on the recommendation of a psychologist as a gift for a struggling single parent of a 14-year old who is living "on the wild side."

A must read for parents of pre-teens & teens!
This book so helpful & useful.I've used a couple of the techniques on my 11 yr old son and they work great.
This is a must read for parents!
I've been recommending it to everyone I know. ... Read more

Product Description
Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need -- and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that question are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them.

One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send.

More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting -- including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (92)

I would rather poke my eye out with a fork!
I understand that there are a lot of ideas out there. This book will make you think. It made me think. I learned two things from this book. 1) all of the parentingskills I have learned are wrongand 2) using this book to parent is the reason why so many kids have issues today. Of course, this is just my opinion. Many people love this book.

A mind-bending way of looking at parenting and human behavior in general
Our daughter's psychologist recommended this as a way of coping with a kid who may just be wired differently when it comes to how they see the world and what control they try to have over it. After reading the book a few weeks ago, we've already been able to implement some of the thoughts behind it. First off, you have to be either fairly open-minded to accept what the book has to say (or perhaps so much so at wit's end that you'll take any relief). The first 5 chapters or so are tough to handle because it essentially deconstructs what most of us consider parenting. As the chapters go on, you'll be surprised at how much of it can make sense. The remaining chapters build up techniques and ideas that you can actually use in real life.

I liked this book so much after reading it at the library that I purchased it from Amazon so that I could highlight passages that mattered to me. I even ended up taking notes from the book so that I always have a cheat-sheet handy. Some of the premises can be pretty radical, but no one is saying you have to adopt all of it, it's just a matter of respecting another human being (in this case, your kids) and allowing them to have some choices. For example, the main premise is that traditional parenting is conditional -- do something right and you'll get love (and attention) from a parent. Instead, author Alfie Kohn turns the thought around to say that we should always offer love, even when we're tempted to withhold it. As such, get ready to read about stopping punishing, spanking, and time-outs. Instead, the book keeps the reader from worrying about being over-permissive and instead concentrates how to build self-esteem in children without offering false praise (well, really much in the way of praise in general) or even grades (which are just a form of judgment) but instead making observations that keep the child interested in learning or whatever it was they were doing for the praise.

I actually think that the book is applicable to human behavior in general, and apparently the author has explored this beyond the topics covered in this book. Still, I've thought about how to apply some of his thinking within the workplace. For example, by offering praise to my staff am I just creating praise junkies, or is there a way I can truly recognize what they are doing and by doing so, keep them from being self-conscious about rewards or punishment and instead continue to be creative? It's all good stuff and even if you don't buy into it all, I think there's some eye-opening thought provocation for every parent in here. Like I said, it's starting to make our household more peaceful and I feel better about the type of parent I am for having read it.

the world would be a better place if every parent read this book
if your a parent read it. if you can't get along with your parents read it. great book- powerful- science based- but also practical and easy to work into a parenting style- has made a big impact in how i work with my daughter.

Makes sense deeply & works.
So many times while listening to parents I think of the wit and wisdom of Alfie Kohn.It hits the spot.Since I find myself recommending this book more and more often, let me share some of what it has given me.

An important point I took home from Unconditional Parenting, apart from the sheer joy of the title, is:in the event of misbehavior, respond to your child, not to bystanders. When I have shared this advice with others, their wide-eyed sighs of gratitude show that people crave permission to do this and many other things Kohn advises to support autonomy.Another key is: "avoid rushing." These techniques really do work.As parents, we don't need to demean ourselves or our children by resorting to bribes, law-enforcement via time-outs, counting, and other ways to maintain the upper hand.We really can explain and be answerable and flexible, thus modeling responsible behaviour.

Kohn has my thanks for his clear message on praise. When my daughter was just 20 months old I held back (with great difficulty, I might add) from "praising" a drawing she had made, remaining silent long enough to hear her observe, "mountains." From that day I was sold.

To be honest, when I read _Unconditional Parenting_ five years ago, I called it a "dumbed down version of the Continuum Concept" -- not to dismiss "for dummies" books.Having lived among indigenous communities in India, I could relate to some of the observations Liedloff made about family relationships among the Yecuana, and bristled at what I read as his attempts to translate these into lessons fitting a suburban middle-class consumer lifestyle.

Still, in a world where we are surrounded by people ready to accuse parents of being permissive, not-disciplining when we are actually cultivating inner discipline, it is reassuring to have an articulate expert like Kohn to remind us that there is evidence to support our approach.

Of course I get evidence of this every day. People might call me biased :-). But if I did not see my child growing more capable of making responsible choices, expressing compassion, and learning from mistakes, from where would I get the patience to keep up? It takes a lot of time to listen, answer, explain, give her a role in decision making, explain some more, try to see things from her perspective. It also takes considerable faith to recognize that there is something to learn from a tantrum - both for the child and parent.Much of what we learn goes towards preventing the conditions that lead to the tantrum, since often they are in our control.But no matter what we do, there are times when life does not make sense. A tantrum is one honest response to this -- till we can build inner reserves of confidence in ourselves against the abyss - the absurdity of life, the unquenchable why, what if ... We would do well to acknowledge and respect this process rather than silence or apologize for it.

Every parent should read this book
Only if I could get my wife to read this book. I think the title of this book is a little bit misleading in a sense that people might shy away from getting this amazing book thinking "ha! another parenting book telling us to spoil our children".

If you have kids, you SHOULD read this book. The author's arguments are so logical that you cannot deny them. Everything he talks about in this book hit me hard and made me rethink about how I should raise my kids.

Please do yourself a favor. Read this book now. ... Read more

Product Description
A practical guide to parenting that starts with the differences that the Gospel makes in the lives of those doing the parenting - most Christian books ignore this aspect. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (10)

Probably best Christian parenting book I've ever read
This book is probably the best Christian parenting book I've read.Though perhaps obvious on the one hand, it's easy to overlook in the day to day grind that the gospel is what you need to return to again in again throughout the parenting journey.

My Favorite Book About Parenting
This was a book I purchased several months ago that I thought my wife and I would benefit from and enjoy. Initially I misunderstood a couple of Farley's statements in his introduction. They sounded as if the spiritual depth and sincerity of parents, particularly that of fathers, determined whether children became vibrant Christians or people who lacked faith. I got the impression that if you just followed Pastor Farley's parenting methods, all would be good with your kids. However, this is not want Pastor Farley is saying at all. He clearly states that it is God who opens our eyes. Farley is merely stating that parents who keep the gospel message of Jesus Christ at the center of their lives have the answer to all parenting situations. We must proclaim this message to our children at all times.

Gospel-Powered Parenting was not what I expected. I thought I was purchasing a how-to book that would give me lots of practical advice, but what I received was much better - a 230 page book with not only lots of practical advice, but a theology book on parenting. Like the Book of Ephesians, the first half of Gospel-Powered Parenting is more doctrinal and the second half is more practical. We must first have a clear understanding of who God is, who we are and what our roles are as parents, before we can be effective fathers and mothers. This is what the book provides, not worldly counseling, but the gospel of grace and truth.

Gospel-Powered Parenting is written from a conservative perspective grounded on the Word of God so if you are not a Christian or you possess some liberal views, you will probably not like this book. If you believe spanking children is child abuse, that submission is a curse word, that babies are little angels who do not sin, and that we are all going to Heaven, this book might flat out bother you. Be that as it may, I would still highly recommend that you read Farley's book. Pastor Farley is a humble man who admits that he is far from perfect. I really appreciated his openness and his focus on fatherhood. Although I do not agree with everything I read in Gospel-Powered Parenting, I feel it is the best book I have ever read on building the right kind of families. I highly recommend it.

Awesome book
What an amazingly balanced book--parental role of authority (so rare in culture today) and grace, grace, grace.I love this book!!!

Good Parenting Starts With Good Theology
In Gospel-Powered Parenting, William P. Farley says that parenting must start with good theology. In light of that conviction, it's not surprising that he spends the first five chapters discussing the gospel, the fear of God, God's holiness, and God's grace. Instead of quotes from parenting experts and psychologists, readers will find theologians--John Frame, Martyn Lloyd-Jones, R.C. Sproul--quoted throughout the book. This focus immediately sets the book apart.

After laying the theological groundwork, Farley spends the next six chapters on practical application. The topics are the importance of a strong marriage, the importance of the father's involvement, discipline, teaching in the home, and love and affection.

Farley says that the first principle of parenting is developing a strong marriage. Many parents put great effort into raising their children, yet they neglect the health of the marriage. This is a mistake:

"Marriage centered, not child-centered, moms usually exert the greatest influence on their children for Christ and the kingdom. This means that your weekends away with your husband, alone, might influence your children more than all your teaching and disciplining combined."

Although mothers are more likely to read parenting books, Farley says that it is the fathers who need to read them. Study after study shows that fathers have the greatest influence over their children. It is no coincidence that the few verses in the Bible related to parenting are addressed to the fathers. It's unfortunate that fathers too often leave the bulk of the responsibility with their wife.

Regarding discipline, Farley's approach is much like what you find in Tedd Tripp's Shepherding a Child's Heart. Consistent discipline, including corporal punishment, is essential. "The world says, `Corporal punishment is child abuse.' But the Bible answers, `Failure to discipline is child abuse.'" All discipline must be done in love and with an eye on the ultimate goal: changing the child's heart:

"The heart is the target. The goal is not just morality. It is new birth. We do not get new birth by being moral; rather, new birth produces biblical morality. Therefore, wise parents aim their discipline at the heart. Fundamentally, Christian parents discipline heart attitudes, not behaviors."

I'm not comfortable with the emphasis placed on spanking. I do believe that spanking is necessary and effective sometimes, but not all of the time, nor with all children. In chapter 9, "Discipline that Preaches," Farley tells of a time when he spanked his son for pouting (page 165). And he gives other examples that I'm not comfortable with. While I agree with the main points of the chapters on discipline, I'm not sure to what extent they should be applied. Spanking, I believe, should be used in moderation.

The last emphasis I'll mention is that on teaching in the home. Many Christian parents leave this to the Christian schools and Sunday schools. And they assume that their children know and understand the gospel. But parents must teach and re-teach the gospel in the home, and they must apply it to every aspect of daily life. Not only should there be informal teaching, but times of formal teaching are essential. Parents can't do too much:

"Children don't reject our faith because of too much formal Bible teaching. They reject it because we don't practice it. They reject it because we practice it but do not value it enough to teach it to them....But too much knowledge is not the problem. A lack of knowledge usually is the problem."

Gospel-Powered Parenting is a good and Biblical book. The principles are based upon a theologically sound view of the gospel.Irecommend it to parents, grandparents, and teachers.

Yes, but.....
Parenting is hard. It is a mixture of joy, laughter, tears, sadness, disappointment (with self and with your children), struggles, rewards, satisfaction, fear, worry, contentment, thanksgiving and a hundred other adjectives.

Parenting books and especially Christian parenting books are plentiful - all with advice, plans, schedules and more advice on how to parent `successfully'.

This is an interesting addition to the `Parenting' library.

Farley's main point is that there is little direct biblical instruction on parenting. And the reason for this is that the Gospel is (or at least should be) the tutorial that informs our parenting.

Farley begins with five assumptions which parents must hold - and then he unpacks these five assumptions throughout the book. The five are:

1. effective Christian parents assume that parenting will not be easy but that rewards will ultimately make it worth while
2. effective Christian parents are willing to hold God's sovereignty and their responsibility in tension
3. effective Christian parents assume an offensive mindset. They pursue their child's heart - they do everything possible to make the gospel attractive. The gospel is the focus and goal for the parent NOT protecting their children from worldly influence
4. effective Christian parents are shrewd about new birth. They do not assume it. They understand the nature of new birth and they carefully look for its symptoms.
5. Effective Christian parents labor to focus their families on God not their children.

There is much in this book which is not politically correct in our society today. For example he advocates the use ofcorporal discipline (spanking). And, he says, a spanking SHOULD hurt the child. However, once the child is spanked, you should hold them. Much of modern society and many in the Christian church would disagree with that.

Also, I found the chapter on `Gospel Fathers', which expresses his view of headship, unbalanced. I do not think he portrayed a biblical or balanced view on headshipand that was frustrating. In fact, the way he wrote the chapter suggested to me he really does not understand biblical headship. Rather than coming across as someone who advocates Biblical headship (which I advocate) he simply came across as a male chauvinist. Biblical headship has two sides of the coin - a wife IS to submit to her husband- but the husband is to love his wife AS CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH. Farley never mentions this side of headship in the book - the dying of the husband for his wife - he only mentions the wife submitting to the husband and when you present only ONE side of biblical headship it comes across as male domination.

Farley's main premise; that the Gospel should shape and be at the center of our parenting is of course right. Not necessarily because it is THE right parenting model - but because as Christians the Gospel SHOULD shape EVERY aspect of our lives. So on one level this book should be redundant. Of course we should be parenting from a foundation of the gospel. The fact that there is a need for this book shows just how far the gospel can be from being the center of everything we do. The next book could be "Gospel Powered Employee", then the "Gospel Powered Employer" or "Gospel Powered School Teacher" etc.

Another thing this book (and other parenting books) do not develop (although I guess its partially covered under #2 of his assumptions) is what happens when you follow ALL of this and still your child does not respond. The mantra is too often "My child was rebellious but now they are a perfect son / daughter." Perhaps we need a book which is written by a godly parent who parented in a gospel powered fashion, and it did not work - that the child rebelled and continued to rebel. For the danger of these type of books is they can subconsciously suggest that if you follow this path your child WILL be fine. Sometimes children are not fine. And many a good parent loses their child to a life of rebellion through no fault of the parent, but because we are steeped in sin and sometimes people do not respond to the gospel. And that is hard.

Having said all that - I would still encourage parents to read this book. There is much to be gleaned from its pages. ... Read more

Product Description
Parenting little ones can be exhausting...until you discover Love and Logic. Take the exhaustion out and put the fun into parenting your little one.

If you want help with:

* Potty training

* Temper tantrums

* Bedtime

* Whining

* Time-out

* Hassle-free mornings

* and many other everyday challenges

Then this book is for you!

This book is the tool parents of little ones have been waiting for. America's Parenting Experts® Jim Fay and Charles Fay, Ph.D., help you start your child off on the right foot. The tools in Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood will give you the building blocks you need to create children who grow up to be responsible, successful teens and adults. And as a bonus you will enjoy every stage of your child's life and look forward to sharing a lifetime of joy with them. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (147)

This book is a brilliant!
I loved parenting with love and logic but wasn't sure how to apply it to my own children ages 5,3 and 1(yikes!) This book is an awesome bridge to applying the original love and logic principles to small children. It is a lot of work on the parents part to apply them, but I can tell it's already making a difference in how I feel about parentig and how my kids behave. Totally recommend this!

Good philosophy.
I thought this book was going to be a bit different.I thought it would have a little humor and have give general tips for dealing with toddlers.Although not what I expected this book have a overall teaching philosophy that I think might be helpful.It takes patience and time to get the hang of what they recommend....it's not difficult, actually rather simple, but just takes patience.Interesting to check out though...and in a ideal world I think most parents would parent this way most of the time.

CHANGED MY LIFE.....AND MY DAUGHTER'S!
I LOVED LOVED LOVED this book!!!!My daughter and I were getting into screaming matches every day and after using the techniques in this book, I had a whole new kid.

At that point, I'd tried EVERYTHING!from time outs, redirection, removal from the situation, taking away privileges, screaming, yelling, and spanking.Now, we don't have screaming matches any more, she listens, is VERY helpful, and is now giving us "choices" hahhahahahah.

for a while i'd stopped using the techniques, and paid dearly for it.once i started using them again....she fell right back into line.i get compliments daily on how well behaved she is and how polite she is.we still have our spats, but they are much more under control and don't spiral out of control like they used to.ABSOLUTELY A MUST HAVE FOR ANYONE WITH A TODDLER!!!!

Best parenting book out there
This helped my wife and I finally come to a happy place with our 2 1/2 year old.We bought this and **Parenting With Love And Logic (Updated and Expanded Edition)** but I wouldn't recommend the other book if your kids are under 6 - there's a lot of the same info, and a lot of things that don't apply to toddlers.

Wish we had this book a year ago - it'll save your sanity!

What a relief!
I was starting to get overwhelmed with my daughter when my sister told me about this book. I bought it but didn't get very far. It took me only a few months before I became DESPERATE! I have only a chapter left or so, but what I have used so far has WORKED. I am so excited to actually use all of these techniques together. Even though I am not perfect at these yet i have found that my daughter is even a little more forgiving and easier to handle! I am starting to have fun again! ... Read more

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Customer Reviews (29)

Quite frankly, the best.
Of all the parenting books I have read, Susan's is the best.Her advice goes far, far below the simplistic levels that we all want answers to, to the much deeper relationship with our children that is truly possible.I sometimes react to Susan's thinking with, "Yes, that's lovely, but what do I SAY when my kid does XY or Z??"And yet - when I absorb and follow what she recommends, my relationship with my children no longer has me asking that question, because the formerly annoying behavior is simply GONE.In place of the behavior I was tearing my hair out over, is a genuine relationship with my child.This book will challenge you and inspire you.And Susan's on-line classes are amazing, insightful and worth every penny (and they don't take very many pennies).

Practical, easy to implement & grounded -somewhere between old and new school parenting, just where I needed it to be
In the 6 years we have been parents, my husband has read 2 books, The Expectant Father and Parenting without Power Struggles. I have read more, which I'm sure is not uncommon. This book has made us better parents and has also made us better partners in parenting. Susan's methods are a mix of practical, developmentally appropriate approaches that are easy to implement in day to day situations.When one of us is struggling, we talk about the book to each other, and that helps us regain perspective.In some ways, Susan has become an absentee referee in our own parenting disagreements.He's more old-school, I'm more touchy-feely. This book met us in the middle. In some chapters she affirmed some things we were already doing and in others she gave us new perspective into what was really going on between us and the kids. I want to say that this book has some good old fashioned advice, but it's not old fashioned in it's presentation or reasoning. In our case, this book helped us as much with the power struggles between us as parents, as between us and the kids.

The Necessary Perennial Wisdom Updated
"Parenting Without Power Struggles" is a valuable tool for any parent who feels their only choice for dealing with family conflicts is either "Give In" or "Fight Back."

For some readers, this book is just common sense.It DOES repeat much of the information that became available during the 1960s and 70s, but too many parents today have never heard of many of these methods,techniques and mindsets.And besides, every generation needs an update--particularly since today's family culture is as spread out as it is fragmented.

Susan and her book are part of the long tradition of helping to pass along generational wisdom.We need more books like this.

The writing style is very accessible and takes the committed as well as the clueless through a step-by-step journey toward learning effective ways of relating to children.As an added bonus, nearly all of the skills in the book are useful for navigating around the adult world, too.The author gives good attention to context as well--something many child development books full of "tips and techniques" often miss.

Being a former mediator, I would recommend it to anyone and everyone.We parents can never get enough tools to try out and add to our collections.

Best Parenting Book Ever
I have also read numerous parenting books and this one is by FAR my favorite.To answer the reviewer of "Nothing New", while you will find some of the concepts in other books, the parenting techniques in this book are what makes it great.The strategies are practical, easy to implement, highly effective AND they apply to children of all ages - adults included.

I read about Susan Stiffelman and her book on one of my online parenting groups.After reading the book I also signed up for her 30 day Parenting Cyber-Class to help me incorporate her methods into my daily life.Thank you Susan for making me a better parent!

For more information on Susan Stiffelman's Cyber-Class visit her web site:
[...]

Eye opener
This book has really changed my life. I have I think read at least a dozen of other parenting books that all go into the same direction, how to built up the connection with your children that is so important and rewarding. But this book not only gives you a lot of theoretical background, it also gives you a lot of input on how you can change your life and live after its principles. I don't think that it only makes your relationship to your children better, but I am sure applying the methods used here the relationships one has with his spouse or friends or coworkers or with one self will also improve.

For me this book has openednew doors in my communication and relationship with the people I love. It has put me on a journey where staying connected is the main asset for living a wonderful life together with your loved ones. ... Read more

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Customer Reviews (39)

Getting to Calm
My daughter was way beyond 'wit's end' with her 13-year old.A battle to get her up and send her to bed, with non-stop Attitude between.The household was so disrupted by the endless emotional commotion that they were thinking seriously about medications and psychiatrists.I heard this book mentioned, ordered a copy, read it in one night, and handed to my daughter."Read it now," I said."You need this book."

Have the problems disappeared?Certainly not!We have a 13-year old girl in our lives!But her mother has a new and powerful tool.When conflict begins, Mom dashes away for a quick consultation; the chapters and sections are designed to work this way, offering on-the-spot, targeted strategies.And the hidden secret of this book is that the "Getting to Calm" begins with calming the parents.It works so well that my daughter refers to the book as "my valium!"And, faced with relaxed and confident parents, my granddaughter is sailing through her "moments" with much greater ease.

The book is realistic, about both teens and their parents.The calming begins when you realize that you don't have the only child that behaves this way and that you aren't the only parent who is hurt & angry.The book takes time to discuss what is happening, physiologically and psychologically; it helps to know that this stage is as necessary and natural as it is trying.The case studies are realistic, the voice of the book is wise & friendly, and the recommendations really really work.

great for parents (and for spouses)
I heard the author speak on PBS.I was very impressed and ordered the book.It was just what I hoped it would be--a rational, sensible approach to child rearing.I recommend it to my patients regularly.Many of the principles are applicable to marital situations (minus the parental overtones)).Calm is always a good place to be.

Break out your highlighter!
I wish I'd had this book three years ago! I feel like someone has bugged my house and now is sitting down with me to help me make things better. Wherever this book falls open, you can start reading and learn something useful. I have spot-read through it, and am starting at the beginning, dog-earring and highlighting as I go. I feel "guilty as charged" when I read portions of the descriptions of conflicts with teens, but I also see places where I made a better choice. I'm also learning to modulate my expectations of what a teenage brain can handle -- what I read as defiance and lying may sometimes just be genuine confusion. Although I'm recommending this book unreservedly to every parent I know, I'm not loaning out my copy -- I need it handy for reference, and everyone should have their own copy to mark up and re-read.

Incorporate CALM
This is a wonderful, practical tool that parents of tweens and teens should keep on their bedside table for reminder and review purposes.Even though the approach described makes perfect sense, I am not sure it is totally intuitive in the heat of the moment.It requires a little practice and review, but once you have incorporated it as your default approach to difficult situations, it's great.And, can save you and your loved ones from the expenditure of so much negative energy.That's a good thing.

Excited about Getting to Calm
As a father of two (now twenty-something) sons, I am lamenting that there wasn't "Getting to Calm" when I was in the peak of parenting!Kastner and Wyatt have created a highly informed - and practical - manual for families.I read a number of parenting books over ten years ago, and found none as helpful as this one.So much of parenting is dealing with escalating, "on-the-ground" situations, and this book has excellent advice for that.The Family Story format demonstrates the "if-then" nature of discussions with teens.Each statement, depending on how it is made and received, can lead to an inflammatory response or to a "calm" one.The authors point out the great benefits now available from advances in brain research.A must-read for all parents of teens! ... Read more

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Customer Reviews (6)

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity
This is an awesome book to use with a Small Group of new parents!We are having a weekly Small Group Study for new parents and this book is awesome!

This is a must read for new paretns.

Influencing Our Children Is the Goal
Parenting Beyond Your Capacity: Connect Your Family to a Wider Community (The Orange Series) is the latest in the collection of books in the Orangetradition.Reggie Joiner has been the leader of this movement that has attempted to combine the yellow force (church) and the red force (family) to impact the lives of children and young adults in powerful ways.In this book, co-authored by Carey Neiuwhof, the orange philosophy is applied to parenting.Joiner and Neiuwhof demonstrate that parents need to partner with the church to go beyond their own abilities.As parents allow other Christians into the lives of their children, their children are influenced in powerful ways.

Consistent with the Orange approach to ministry and family, Joiner and Neiuwhof encourage parents to find ways to discuss faith in natural family settings.They list some opportunities that work well with the resources that are available from the ReThink Group, though the book never offers up these resources specifically except in some advertising at the end of the book.They also encourage the spiritual growth of the parents as well, which can happen by taking time out from life and by getting involved with small groups in a church setting.

What is great about this book is the honesty that the writers show.They are willing to admit their own parenting mistakes, and they never speak from the position of superiority.As they note, so many Christian parenting books only bring about feelings of guilt and inadequacy.This book says that we are all imperfect, and we need influences from outside the home to help us figure all of this out.

works on every family's level
This is a GREAT book for spiritual parenting novices and experts both.It outlines some fantastic principles and leaves the details to be determined by your own family.It really focuses on helping parents see their priorities and how to teach those priorities to their children.It's also very encouraging, a "you CAN do this" pep talk at times.None of it will have you feeling guilty over your current inaction or overwhelmed with their recommended action plans.It will simply inspire you to find ways to fit more faith into your family's everyday life.

Powerful Insight re: leveraging influence for parents
Wish I had this book as a young parent! ALL parents can truly benefit from the insight of these two seasoned leaders(both are Dads too).This book will help parents see the power of partnering with others to influence the heart of their kids and increase their capacity as parents. Great Father's Day gift!

These guys are geniuses!
This book is anything but another "to do list" for parents. Unlike many other parenting books I've read, I did not put it down feeling overwhelmed and like a failure.I put it down with much to think about and feeling challenged to be a better Mom...even if one little baby step at a time.The book is filled with fun little stories that give us glimpses into the lives of Reggie & Carey.I LOVE this book & will use it as a gift for dear friends & family. ... Read more

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Customer Reviews (4)

Making Space For Kids
I think that Michelle has really captured the coming zeitgeist in regard to child spirituality and parenting. Anthony's work is really about the margins that surround our family life and how to capture those moments for Christ. You will come away with a fresh perspectives on making every moment count. If the Deut. 6 call to make God a part of every environment you are living in inspires you, then buys Michelle's book!
Give Your Kids the Keys: Navigating Your Child to a Personal and Sustainable Faith

Fabulous Overview of Foundational Elements that will Enhance any Parenting Strategy
Clearly written she marries practical content with real life examples so believers can learn to do just what the title says, spiritually parent.With biblical truths in each chapter Anthony provides ten environments that parents should attempt to create for their children.These environments include: storytelling, identity, faith community, service, out of the comfort zone, responsibility, course correction, love and respect, knowing, and modeling.Anthony's books' theology is based upon the premise that when we create these environments for our children, it puts them in God's path and allows the Holy Spirit to do the work from there.The goal of spiritual parenting is that our children would learn to hear and know God's voice, desire to obey it, and obey it in the power of God's Spirit, not their own strength (p.194).Such is one all people would profit from obtaining.

Feel free to check out other reviews of mine at [...]

Spiritual Parenting
Very easy read, and filled with good spiritual foundation, common sence, that helps bring daily living to a managable level.

Best Parenting Advice Ever
Read this book. If Christ is the center of my life, He will be in my kids' lives too, right? This book helped me to realize that is my TRUE role as a parent. Then it showed me some awesome ways to prepare them to know their God who loves them. The satisfactory behavior is just a side effect! :) ... Read more

Product Description
Is it OK to sleep with your newborn baby? How old is tooold for breastfeeding? These questions and more are answered in thislatest addition to the Sears Parenting Library. Attachment Parentingencourages early, strong, and sustained attention to the new baby'sneeds and this book outlines the steps that will create the mostlasting bonds between parents and their children. Practical andinspirational, this book, the heart of the Sears' parenting creed, isa necessity for every new parents' bookshelf. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (67)

Good for new parents
This is a great book offering tips and facts on breastfeeding, baby wearing, bonding, etc. It was not very helpful for me as my son is 10 months old already and we've been practicing attachment parenting since he was born. I was also very informed about things such as breastfeeding so I didn't learn anything new but I definitely will pass it along to other family members who aren't as informed and don't know about attachment parenting!

A recommended book for new parents or parents-to-be, or if you are changing your parenting style and are new to attachment parenting.

Great intro to Attachment parenting
wanted to write and let you know of a new database of API supportive groups and professionals that I just launched. Feel free to visit our site and if you know of professionals or a playgroup that are AP supportive, add them in to our dabase! We also have room to chat and discuss books such as "Unconditional Parenting" and "No Cry Sleep Solution," as well as this book, The Attachment Parenting Book.

The site is [...] The database is [...] .

Thanks for your time and consideration.

Glad I'm not the only one.
I was so thrilled to find this book, which simply substantiates everything I've been doing instinctively since our baby was born--nursing on demand, responding to her cries, holding her a lot, etc. I have never liked the term "spoiled" to describe a baby, and I always knew that any child of mine would never be left in the crib alone and frightened to cry it out. So what a welcome surprise it was to find out I am one of many who espouse this "attachment" philosophy.

When it comes to babies, I believe you need a certain amount of science combined with a healthy dose of animal instinct. Dr. Sears brings to the table medical expertise, along with the practical experience of raising multiple children and a deep respect for the innate knowledge parents have from the get-go. His advice is organic, not demanding, as he explains how attachment parenting can work for a wide range of families in many circumstances.

I would recommend this book to anyone researching baby-care techniques. It is a clear, natural approach to child rearing, and one that we will practice for the duration of our daughter's childhood.

Not what I expected
I thought this would recommend how to deal with an attached baby but it does the opposite. Not my cup of tea.

No Scientific Studies Cited
I'm a big fan of the AP style, so I checked out this book.It's terribly written.Dr. and Mrs. Sears what were you thinking?You write things like "Studies show that the more a mother and baby nurse, the higher the mother's prolactic levels"and "Researchers at Stanford University found that babies settle best when held by caregivers who move in all planes of motion..."Could you please cite your sources?Which studies?There are no footnotes and no annotated bibliography.If you are going to write a book and use research to back up your style of parenting, please tell us these studies and scientists so that we can read the studies for ourselves.That's all I'm saying.Otherwise it looks like rhetoric and that your trying to make money by selling a poorly and quickly written book. ... Read more

Product Description
Picture respectful, responsible, obedient children who entertain themselves without television or video games, do their own homework, and have impeccable manners. A pie-in-the-sky fantasy? Not so, says family psychologist and bestselling author John Rosemond. Any parent who so desires can grow children who fit that description -- happy, emotionally healthy children who honor their parents and their families with good behavior and do their best in school.

In the 1960s, American parents stopped listening to their elders when it came to child rearing and began listening instead to professional experts. Since then, raising children has become fraught with anxiety, stress, and frustration. The solution, says John, lies in raising children according to biblical principles, the same principles that guided parents successfully for hundreds of years. They worked then, and they still work now!

Through his nationally syndicated newspaper column and eleven books, John has been helping families raise happy, well-behaved children for more than thirty years. In Parenting by The Book, which John describes as both a "mission and a ministry," he brings parents back to the uncomplicated basics. Herein fi nd practical, Bible-based advice that will help you be the parent you want to be, with children who will be, as the Bible promises, "a delight to your soul" (Pro. 29-17). As a bonus, John also promises to make you laugh along the way. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (85)

Don't throw the baby out w/ the bathwater!
There is much good to be gleaned from this veteran psychologist. He has indeed "turned his back" on the postmodern "excuses-for-all" model and explains his position well. The negative reviews are too harsh I think. The book does not advocate spankings as the best or only way of discipline; it just explains that there IS indeed a correct way to apply corporal punishment...with hugs and acceptance afterward. Rosemond goes to great trouble to explain that the Biblical "rod" is not literal but figurative as in leadership. Perhaps those reviewers did not finish the book once they saw the buzword "spanking"----I am impressed with anyone who is brave enough to come out of the psychology world with any positive and clear insight. Good job John!

Best Book I've read on parenting
This has to be the best book I've read on parenting. It is a logical, common sense approach, based on wisdom and direction from the Bible, which has beeen tried and tested for generations. As the author explains, if the new and enlightened method of modern pschology is so much better, why the dramatic rise in behavioral and emotionalproblems among children and teens? Why are kids dealing with behaviorial and emotional issues that did not even exist 50 years ago?This book takes the mystery and unrealistic expectation from parents to magicaly shape their childrens fragile self esteem. Because we are told by modern psycology, that if we screw that one up, our children will be scarred for life, drop out of school and enter a life of crime. Interestingly enough, he points out that incarcerated criminals as a group,consistantly test highest for self esteem compared to the rest of us. the Truth is the Truth, no matter how much a new method tries to say other wise, and this book pionts us back to the Truth.

Finally Guilt Free Parenting
How our children disrespect us leaving clothes on the floor every day, not obeying commands, being argumentative and angry!!! We on the other hand try to persuade, reward, punish and finally get crazy and start to yell.....
This book is not a hope this book is " a saving hand" for us poor adults. It does not recommend spanking but rather spiritual leadership. Me us a kid ofcourse hated being spanked for lying to my father even thou I only lied because I was afraid to admit the truth...hovewer this experience was powerful enough (as he only spanked me one time in my life and it was gentle enough that it really did not hurt) that I will to the rest of my life try to live in truth. I have not remember as a child being punished frequently my father word and his look was effective enough - I did not like it I would rather have a buddy like pappa but being who I am now I think this preserved my soul. We were afraid of our parents yes but we have been realy punished. Our kids on other hand disrespect us much as they want and the punishemnt we implicit is not effective enough however frequent it could be.

So this book really does not recommend punishement it offers it as a way to get there where we as children used to be in respect to our elders.

Please read that book as it will save your sanity and recommend to as many people as possible......

No more bulshit parenting for me...

Great guidance for Christian families
This is a great book for Christian families.Rosemond identifies the issues with today's families successfully and presents real opportunities for meaningful change.Those struggling with their marriage due to the never ending tasks of their children will find sound, simple guidance for turning around their marriage and their family.If parents throughout America followed the guidance in this book, children in America would benefit.Please don't be fooled by other reviews that do Rosemond the disservice of missing the point of his message by stating that Rosemond simply says 'spank your children and everything will be okay'.Rosemond presents a clear, biblical blueprint for the family, its structure, and its priorities beginning with the success of the marriage...and it is good.

Transformed my home and my marriage!
This book was given to me and my husband as a gift by an older couple at our church whose daughter had recently read this book and raved about it had make such a tremendous impact in her home.This book has honestly transformed our lives, not only in regards to raising our children but also in the relationship between me and my husband.We are all much happier and things run so much more smoothly.I have been recommending this book to every mother i know!The advice is completely practical and very effective.And the best part - it is all Biblically based! How better to glorify the Lord that to train up your children in the way they should go - His way! Even if you are not Christian, i promise that this book makes sense and will make a huge difference in you home life.Your children will thank you later! Also, please make sure to read the ENTIRE book, it really is a wonderful wonderful book. One of the best gifts i've ever received! ... Read more

Product Description

Today show's Michele Borba's cures for difficult childhood behaviors

In this down-to-earth guide, parenting expert Michele Borba offers advice for dealing with children's difficult behavior and hot button issues including biting, temper tantrums, cheating, bad friends, inappropriate clothing, sex, drugs, peer pressure, and much more. Written for parents of kids age 3-13, this book offers easy-to-implement advice for the most important challenges parents face with kids from toddlers to tweens.

• Includes immediate solutions to the most common childhood problems and challenges
• Written by Today Show's resident parenting expert Michele Borba
• Offers clear step-by-step guidance for solving difficult childhood behaviors and family conflicts
• Contains a wealth of advice that is easy-to-follow and gets quick results
• Author has written outstanding parenting books including Building Moral Intelligence, No More Misbehavin', Don't Give Me that Attitude, and more

Each of the 101 issues includes clear questions, specific step-by-step solutions, and advice that is age appropriate.Amazon.com Review

Product Description

In this down-to-earth guide, parenting expert Michele Borba offers advice for dealing with children's difficult behavior and hot button issues including biting, temper tantrums, cheating, bad friends, inappropriate clothing, sex, drugs, peer pressure, and much more. Written for parents of kids age 3-13, this book offers easy-to-implement advice for the most important challenges parents face with kids from toddlers to tweens.

• Includes immediate solutions to the most common childhood problems and challenges
• Written by Today Show's resident parenting expert Michele Borba
• Offers clear step-by-step guidance for solving difficult childhood behaviors and family conflicts
• Contains a wealth of advice that is easy-to-follow and gets quick results
• Author has written outstanding parenting books including Building Moral Intelligence, No More Misbehavin', Don't Give Me that Attitude, and more

Each of the 101 issues includes clear questions, specific step-by-step solutions, and advice that is age appropriate.

Top Ten Proven Parenting Solutions
Content from Dr. Michele Borba

Here is just a sample of the hundreds of proven and simple tips from Dr. Borba’s latest book, The Big Book of Parenting Solutions. The best news is that these solutions work for all ages, take less than a minute to do, are based on proven research and when consistently used will reap lasting change.

1. Get attention: Lower your voice almost to a whisper and then say your request. Kids aren’t used to a quiet request.

2. Increase positive behavior: Research shows that giving kids the right kind of praise (called “positive reinforcement”) is one of the best ways to shape new behavior. So, catch your kid doing the action you want. Just make sure your praise is specific and tells your child exactly what he did right. (Adding “because” or “that” takes your praise up a notch. “I’m so impressed that you started your homework all by yourself this time.”)

3. Stretch persistence: Praising the child’s effort (“You’re working so hard”) and not inherent intelligence(”You’re so smart”) is proven to enhance perseverance and performance, but the child is also more likely to bounce back from a mistake—all because he feels success is not mixed.

4. Reduce fear: Expose your child to a fear in small manageable doses and help them develop a statement to speak back to the worry (“Go away worry!” or “I can do this!”)

5. Curb a tantrum: The longer you give attention to a tantrum the longer it lasts. Ignore, ignore, ignore!

6. Nurture kindness: Encourage your child to use the Two Praise Rule everyday. “Say or do at least two kind things to someone.” Random acts of kindness really are catchy!

7. Increase assertiveness: Stress: “Look at the color of the talker’s eyes.” Using eye contact helps kids appear confident. Strong body posture also helps a child be less likely to be bullied.

8. Friendship builder: The two most commonly used traits of well-liked kids are “smiling” and “encouraging.” Reinforce those traits in your child to boost his friendship quotient.

9. Develop healthy eating habits. Eating relaxed family meals regularly enhances kids’ psychosocial well- being, boosts grades and deters behaviors like smoking and drinking and eating disorders as well as teaches the child healthy eating habits.

10. Curb nagging. Say "no" the first time and don’t back down. The average kid nags nine times knowing the parent will give in.

Customer Reviews (40)

Your Personal Parenting Coach
Have a parenting question? Michele Borba will answer it! She has managed to address the majority of concerns that parents have in a clear, easy-to-understand and comprehensive format. The table of contents says it all: a straightforward list of typical parenting problems that is easy to access. If your child has morning problems, social problems, academic problems, behavioral problems or any other problems, you only have to scan the table of contents and turn to the right page. Michele will take it from there. As a parenting "expert" myself (for the past 30 years!), I routinely puruse new parenting books to see how other authors approach parenting challenges. Since I already know more than most readers about this subject, it is pretty hard to impress me. However, Michele Borba has done it in spades! Her sheer scope of issues addressed is impressive. More importantly, she gives very complete information, describing both the issue and its solution in detail. She offers cognitive, behavioral and emotional interventions - all grounded in solid psychological theory and research.The Big Book of Parenting Solutions is a trusted companion on the parenting journey, and I am certainly happy to recommend it to my own clients.
Sarah Chana Radcliffe, author "Raise Your Kids without Raising Your Voice." Raise Your Kids without Raising Your Voice

Great go-to book.
I think this book will come in handy over the next 5-7 years.We have two girls who are toddlers now so we'll be referring to this often I'm sure.Great layout of the content and overall information.

Every parent should have this book...
AWESOME BOOK!Very easy navigation - great solutions for every circumstance.For example, I tried out the recommended techniques in the chapter on "listening" (that's always a challenge with a 5 year old), and they have been working GREAT!In the beginning we had some ups and downs, to the point where my daughter was yelling at me because she was frustrated with the consequences of not listening.I quickly took a time out, ran to my room, and read the chapter on "yelling".I used those techniques simultaneously and everything worked out smoothly.I have been highly recommending this book to all the parents at my daughter's school - even the teachers are commenting on what a great book this is! I know it will come in very handy throughout the next few years being that it covers quite a large age range (3-13) with many emotional and behavioral sections.

Good Book
Guess I expected to"need" more of the info provided. It's a good book, good price, I just didn't relate to a lot of the info.

Not what I thought.
I bought this book because my mom saw her on tv and told me I HAD to get this book because it had the answer to everything in it!I beg to differ.She only touches on some subjects and part of her 101 answers are just general overviews without actually tackling the issue.I was having potty-training issues with my son...not even in there!Nothing about one of the biggest parenting challenges.At this point trying to convince my child to keep curfew is the least of my worries.Too good to be true.If you want some lady who wrote a book to give you all the answers, forget it.She's making money on our society's need to be "perfect parents".Good for her but the book's going to collect dust until I have a teenager that talks back. ... Read more

Product Description
How can parents make a lasting impact in the spiritual lives of their children? To find the answer, acclaimed researcher George Barna investigated the lives of thriving adult Christians and discovered the essential steps their parents took to shape their spiritual lives in childhood. He also learned surprising truths about which popular parenting tactics just aren’t working. Revolutionary Parenting goes beyond youth group and Sunday school and shows parents how to instill in their children a vibrant commitment to Christ. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (24)

Great Book A+
This book is an excellent book.It tells you how to raise a Spiritual Champion and it's the best parenting book when it comes teaching us how to help our child grow into a Christ follower. If you want to raise your child to love God and follow His teaching you need to get this book.

Excellent
This is a book I wished I had when my husband and were raising our two daughters. After George Barna and his research group interviewed thousands of Revolutionary Parents, he spells out what parents did to raise spiritual champions. There's even a summary at the end of each chapter. I bought my first book because I teach classes on parenting. Now I'm buying this book (and the workbook) to give as "baby" presents.

great book
This book delivers what it says. I have read,seen and taught so many different parenting videos and books and feel that this is a book to add to the top 3 if not 1. It should be the foundation (other than the bible) to build your parenting vision. It comes from a different perspective than your usual parenting book. It is more about a focus than specific ways to handle raising kids. It can help motivate and give a clearer purpose behind parenting. The rest is up to you if your'e open to possible constructive criticism, since it could open you up to rethink what your goals have been.

Great buy
The book was small, easy to read and the contents were relevant for the purpose to which the author intended.

Give me the facts ma'am, just the facts!
Cracking the Parenting Code: 6 Clues to Solving the Mystery of Meeting Your Child's Needs

George Barna always gets down to the nitty gritty. The book was full of facts and figures, yet his hope for this generation is evident. Barna never fails to deliver. ... Read more

Product Description
Explore the spiritual dynamics of parenting, and why caring for children is such an effective discipline in shaping our souls and forming the character of Christ within us. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (17)

Best parenting book I have read
Best parenting book I ever read! Most made me feel like I was falling short as a parent. I felt like I could never reach the standards on most books. But this book made me feel human and that we all make mistakes,that there are good days and then there are bad days. God uses all these moments to shape our heart. I highly reccomend this book.

Lays out God's Purpose in Parenting
This book, written for Christian parents and parents-to-be, lays out a wonderful explanation of the importance and underlying purpose of parenting.In the hustle and bustle of all the planning and how-to of parenting, this book brings invaluable perspective.Children are not ours, they are entrusted to us by God to raise them up to follow him.Along the way, this process changes both the parent and child for the better.I highly recommend this book for those who are about to become parents as it will inspire you to greater purpose.Read this before you read the how-to books.

Good, but not as good as Sacred Marriage
This book is a nice change of pace from most "how to" guides on parenting.This doesn't give you instructions or tips or tricks.Instead, it gives you a fresh perspective on how God intended parenting as part of his plan to shape Christians.If you have the right perspective on life, that can help more than trying to force a few tricks into your daily routine.

Sacred Marriage is an excellent book that any married Christian couple (or about to get married) should read.Sacred Parenting isn't as good.The points are somehow more vague and less impactful.The stories and anecdotes drag a little, rather than really breathing life into the lesson.Sacred Parenting is still a good book, but not as good as I hoped after reading Sacred Marriage.

Another good one by Gary Thomas
When I was reading this my daughter saw it and said "Thanks a lot!"I asked her what was wrong and she said, scared parenting?! :)Parenting is scarey, this book gives insight that will give you confidence.

Why, not How
A fresh perspective on parenting. It doesn't focus on the "how-to" of parenting, but rather on "why" do we parent and what we can learn from parenting and how our character can be shaped and changed as a result.
... Read more

Product Description
For parents who wonder whether controlled crying is best or if constant cuddling is better, here is a clear explanation of the science of parenting styles and their effects on children's brain development. Ground-breaking research in the late twentieth century delved into the neuroscience behind child rearing, and this book is the first to explain those theories to parents of toddlers in a clear, engaging form.AUTHOR BIO: Margot Sunderland is Director of Education and Training for the Centre for Child Mental Health in London. A child psychotherapist with 20 years of experience of working with children and families, she directs graduate-level programs in child psychotherapy and emotional literacy for children and is author of more than 20 books on child mental health. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (27)

Exceptional parenting manual!
This book was referred to me by my lactation consultant.It is the "wisest" book I've read on parenting.It assured me that my parenting instincts that have sometimes been against current fads have been healthy for my children!Loved it!

The Science of Parenting
An excellent book and a "must read" for all parents. It explains about the infant brain and it's development, information that all caring parents will want to know about as they embark on their parenting journey.

Thank you Margot for your very readable and "easy to understand" book.

Science will make you a more compassionate parent
Forget about the behaviorist approach of 80's. Human beings are more than S-R, and, especially, the first several years in infancy are critical in physical/emotional/neural development, which will last for the rest of the baby's life. Please be more compassionate with your babies.

Warm, insightful information for parents
This easy-to-enjoy book is written with a great heart for both children and parents. It covers most areas of interest and concern for those involved in the raising of children or grandchildren and offers new evidence of the vital importance, from neuro-science discoveries, of early conversation and interaction of mum and dad with babies and toddlers. A lovely description of play as 'joy juice' highlights the crucial part play has in the emotional and social development of children. The book also suggests some creative approaches to squabbling and sibling rivalry.

Beautifully illustrated.

Parenting from a realistic perspective
We are about to have our first baby, and were told about this book by midwife from our antenatal class.
I am so pleased to have been steered in this direction!
The author's information and ideas for parenting are based on scientific proof and data.
This may sound harsh to some, but with my husband being in the medical area and myself studying brain behavior and psychology, this is right up our alley.
There are many books out there based on theory's of what may or may not work for children, especially in relation to the most important developmental years....from 0-5 years, which are just that THEORY.
What I like about this book as that the author gives good references to scientific papers and actual results from test which prove their methods to be beneficial for the development of baby into a healthy toddler, teenager and then, hopefully into the right path for adulthood.
My only criticism would be that the author does tend to be a bit repetitive at times.
Also it may not be the method that all parents wish to use in bringing up their children.
Still a must read!!!!
... Read more